On 29th September I celebrated 2 booze-free but I kept it fairly quiet on the day 🎉 I wanted to come here and share something with you all but when it came to it, for a plethora of reasons, it just wasn't there. I had a beautiful day but inside I felt sad and needed to move through that first. Sharing these posts open me up to a lot of messages and sometimes I don't feel able to respond to them.
The thing I've struggled most with in these last 6 months is needing help and realising that I am gonna fuck things up and repeatedly get things wrong for the rest of my life. I'm not immune to failure. I'm not immune to hurt. I'm not even immune to falling off the wagon - it takes one small decision to change everything and every day I have to wake up and choose not to drink. It's irresponsible and foolish to think that I know anything for certain - none of us do.
What I feel in my heart is that this is the best choice I've ever made for myself and I owe my life to this decision. I could not be here now, doing what I do, making plans for the future without it. I didn't think I had a future when I was still boozing.
I'm so grateful to know the true, intoxicating power of human connection that is based on truth, that comes from a place of pure love. To every single person who has walked this journey with me, whether it be for a short or long time, thank you. I'm so grateful to be here now, in this form, learning and growing into someone I'm proud to be, warts and all. I'm grateful to be your friend.
Here's me at @eatgenesis on the day, enjoying a beautiful bunch of flowers from @vivahate666 after eating the most peng vegan food ever 😍
#recovery #sober #alcoholfree #soberissexy #boozefree #alcoholfreejourney #dependency #SoberOctober #stoptober