xandriaooi xandriaooi

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Xandria Ooi  Bite-sized inspirations & perspective โค๏ธ TV Host, Speaker โœจ KL www.xandriaooi.co FB live chats ๐Ÿ—ฏ: fb/xandriaooi New inspirational video EVERY DAY๐Ÿ‘‡๐Ÿผ

http://www.youtube.com/xandriaooi

What would we do, if we had all the money in the world? ๐Ÿ’ฐ๐Ÿ’ฐ It's interesting to think about how financial freedom will change us, not what financial freedom will GIVE us; because strange as it sounds, being financially free might have much less to do with the money itself, and much more to do with how our perspective towards fear and choices will change. ๐Ÿค”
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Some people make a lot of money and still fear losing it all, and therefore their fear drives them to constantly acquire more. ๐Ÿ˜ฐ This makes no difference from a poor person who fears having no money. So whilst they make look like very different people on the outside, one rich and one poor, their fear makes them much more similar than we can imagine. ๐Ÿ‘‰๐Ÿผ๐Ÿ’๐Ÿปโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ‘ˆ๐Ÿผ
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Money is not the root of all evil. Nor is money the solution to all problems. Internal conflict and suffering happens with or without money. ๐Ÿ™ It is precisely because money can buy things that we mistake pleasure for happiness, because there's always a spike in our happiness whenever we experience something exquisite. ๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽ‰ But the initial euphoria wears off, and our happiness goes back to the same level as before, because money is not a superpower, all our insecurities and doubts and lack of ability to communicate have not suddenly been resolved. ๐Ÿ˜ž
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If we're cynical and melancholy, if we always feel sorry for ourselves or that we want to be better than others, or if we like we need to possess people to feel lovedโ€ฆ these are traits that translates into issues that not only money cannot resolve, but may actually compound and amplify. ๐ŸŒช
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Being financially free may or may not give us freedom. It depends on our state of mind, and our approach to life itself. Money cannot buy friends, only acquaintances. Money can buy power, but it cannot buy respect.
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What will we do to enrich our lives when we're financially free? Maybe we'll find out that we don't actually need much money to do those things, and we can do them now. โฑ๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿป After all, a peace of mind isn't something money can buy. So choose to be happy, always. โค๏ธ
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Click on link in bio to watch 'Life with Financial Freedom' ๐Ÿ”๐Ÿ’‹ #behappyalways #BHA #timberlandmy #moderntrail

It's normal to hate your job, you can enjoy life after retirement. ๐Ÿคท๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ
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It's normal to focus on your career now, you can enjoy life after retirement. ๐Ÿ’๐Ÿปโ€โ™‚๏ธ
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It's normal to sacrifice now, you can enjoy life after retirement. ๐Ÿ™‹๐Ÿปโ€โ™‚๏ธ
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After retirement, we might be too old, too sick to 'enjoy life', we might not be able to walk, or we might not even be here anymore. ๐Ÿ‘€
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It sounds morbid, but the only real truths we know is that we live and we die. โ˜€๏ธWe have no control over when we're born and when we leave this earth, but we have absolute control over how we live each day in between. ๐Ÿƒ๐ŸŒ
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Yes, we should work hard, to have integrity and passion and dreams, but we were not born to be here so that we can work. โœ–๏ธOur purpose on earth can't be to make money, or to be promoted. ๐Ÿค” Our purpose can't even be to achieve career success, because all of that is just a subset of life.
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Success can only be happiness and peace and love, because when we're on our deathbeds, in our last moments here on earth, we wouldn't be thinking about our career. ๐Ÿ‘ฉ๐Ÿปโ€๐Ÿ’ป We'd be thinking about how we've lived, whether we've experienced what the world has to offer, whether we've spent quality time with our kids and family, whether we've made a difference in the lives of the people we love. โค๏ธ
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Life doesn't stop whilst we work, life doesnโ€™t only begin after retirement, so it makes no sense to postpone our happiness until a later date.
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This shows that it's not work that's holding back our happiness, it's our attitude towards work and life that causes our discontentment and suffering. ๐Ÿ™ Even if our job isn't exciting, even if it's just a stepping stone or even if we don't enjoy it at all - we have to be aware that there's no sense in hating our jobs, or going to a work in a bad mood or with a pessimistic or cynical attitude. Because that's just us lowering our own quality of life. ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿผ
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Live a quality life, and do that by not waiting for the perfect future to arrive. ๐ŸŒฌ We live and we die, and we don't want to waste a moment of that living. ๐Ÿ™†๐Ÿป So choose to be happy, always! โค๏ธ #behappyalways #BHA
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Click on link in bio to watch 'Don't Postpone Your Happiness' ๐Ÿ”๐Ÿ’‹

Change. โœจ We understand that the only constant in this world is change, but that's the kind of change we feel will happen regardless of what we do - We grow older, we fall in and out of love, we change jobs, relationships and hobbies. ๐Ÿ‘ง๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘ต๐Ÿป The other kind of change - changing ourselves - is the sort of change we make happen - the kind of change we may feel is difficult. ๐Ÿ™‡๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ In fact, we may even think that it's impossible to change every aspect of ourselves; no matter how hard we try. ๐Ÿ˜“
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But that is not true. โœ–๏ธ The power and the privilege of being human is that we CAN change any aspect of ourselves if we want to. ๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿป The problem doesn't lie in whether it's possible or not to change ourselves, the problem lies in our expectation of the results from our efforts to change. ๐Ÿ˜
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Change is not a goal - change is a journey. ๐Ÿ‘ฃSo changing any aspects of ourselves that we don't like ISN'T like going to the hair salon, where we walk in with dark hair and come out with blue hair; that kind of change is obvious and instantaneous. ๐Ÿ’จ
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Changing ourselves is more like exercise. ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธWe don't go into the gym one day and walk out with a six pack the next day. ๐Ÿ˜ฌ The change happens bit by bit, over time.
How we conduct the change in our lives is very important - do we try to change by fighting against who we are, or do we try to change by accepting who we are and then working on changing the aspects we would like to be better? โ˜€๏ธ
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It's important to know the difference because the former is laced with frustrations and anger, hence why change can be perceived as impossible, and the latter is filled with love and encouragement, which allows us to slowly but surely change. ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿป
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We CAN change any aspect of ourselves if we try hard enough, but more than that, if we try smart enough - and that is to cultivate the mindset that we change through acceptance and patience, not through fighting and expectations. This way, we'll see the power we have to create the changes we want to be happy, always. โค๏ธ
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Video on 'How To Change Yourself' is up, click on link in bio to watch ๐Ÿ”๐Ÿ’‹ #behappyalways #BHA #lovebonitomy #lbootd #strangersat47

Why do we have goals? ๐Ÿ’๐Ÿป Everything we want - to achieve success, to pursue our dreams, to prove to ourselves that we can do it - are goals we set so that ultimately it leads to us feeling fulfilled, to us being happy. โœจ
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So the main reason why we have goals, or even the only reason - is that it leads to this ultimate goal of our happiness. ๐Ÿ’ซ๐Ÿƒ
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Goals, however, by nature are things that aren't so easy to achieve. It's definitely not a walk in the park. And therefore there's always this sense of pressure in us trying to achieve our goals. ๐Ÿ‘€ This pressure isn't bad, because it can give us a sense of urgency and motivate us to be disciplined and to work hard. ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿป
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It only becomes a problem when our goals bring us suffering, suffering that we've accepted as a normal part of achieving our goals, like stress, anxiety, worry or fear. ๐Ÿ˜ฐ
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This is why some people feel trapped by their success - that they cannot leave this amazing job or business that they have but yet at the same time they don't feel fulfilled or happy. ๐Ÿ˜•
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This is because the real goal all along was not a promotion, or more money or more power, but simply more happiness. ๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿป And happiness doesnโ€™t have to be earned or pursued, it just has to be realised.
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We need to be aware of the difference between fulfilling our potential, or fulfilling the need our ego has to feel important and validated. ๐Ÿ•ธBecause the former brings us closer to happiness, and the latter takes us further from happiness. ๐Ÿ”€
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Ambitions, dreams, success - we make the choices for ourselves to achieve our goals and to realise our potential, and we cannot let the choices we make make us suffer. โœ–๏ธ Because if we're present in this very moment, if we live this moment and breath this moment, then we'll see that there is no future happiness. โ˜€๏ธ There is no other time than now, to be happy, always. โค๏ธ
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Click on link in bio to watch the video on 'Our Goals In Life' ๐Ÿ”๐Ÿ’‹ #behappyalways #BHA #thomassabomy

People say karma's a bitch, but it's not karma that we have to worry about, it's simple cause and effect. ๐Ÿ”
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If you're going to jump on a rope, that rope's going to ripple and bounce, and everyone else standing on that rope will feel the effect of it. Action, consequence. โœ”๏ธ Sometimes we don't care about the consequences affecting other people, and sometimes the consequence to us isn't immediate so we think we've gotten away with it. ๐Ÿ˜ˆ
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And this is where we underestimate the cost of bad behaviour - simply because we think there's a 'reward' for bad behaviour. ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿผ For example, if you yell at a waiter you might get the 'reward' of a discount, or if you bully someone and drag them off a plane you might get the 'reward' of the convenience of an empty seat, but there's so many costs to bad behaviour that aren't tangible but yet we have to be smart enough to see. ๐Ÿ‘€
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When we're rude to someone, when we're entitled, when we show our superiority, when we bully and abuse - we cannot immediately see how it's costing us our reputation, our friends, our relationships, or even our livelihood. .. until itโ€™s too late. ๐Ÿ˜ต
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There is always an additional cost to bad behaviour that is not visible, but very real. Call if karma, or call it logic, but it's inevitable that actions will always have consequences. ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿป
And when the time comes around for us to pay the cost of the consequence, we may not be able to afford it. ๐Ÿ˜“
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So live responsibly, live intelligently and live kindly to have no regrets and be happy, always. โค๏ธ
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Video on 'Do You Believe In Karma?' is up, click on link in bio to watch ๐Ÿ”๐Ÿ’‹#behappyalways #BHA #thomassabomy #lovebonitomy #lbootd

There are many things that influence the way we conduct our lives as adults, and one of them is how we've experienced love growing up. ๐Ÿ‘จโ€๐Ÿ‘จโ€๐Ÿ‘ง
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If your dad showed extreme disappointment in you or punished you for not being the first in class, you'd instinctively equate being the best to acceptance and love; because itโ€™s been ingrained in you that in order to receive praise and approval from your dad, you've always needed to be the best. ๐Ÿฅ‡
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If we've always felt like our mother wished we were better, that we were more perfect and less 'bad', then we'd grow up with the fear of abandonment, because that's what happens to 'bad' people - they get abandoned. ๐Ÿ˜“ It's like your parents leaving you and walking off when you've been bad, or locking you in the closet when you've been bad. ๐Ÿ—ฃ
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Parents do things out of love, but kids don't know how to associate these punishments with love, kids just understand fear and abandonment. ๐Ÿ˜ง
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And when we grow up to be adults, when we are in a relationship, we can be incredibly defensive, sensitive or insecure; where we'd either be afraid to lose someone if we're not perfect enough, or we'd put up a wall to protect ourselves so that even as we love, we will never allow ourselves to be vulnerable, because if we're not vulnerable, no one can hurt or abandon us. โœ–๏ธ
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What is past is past. ๐ŸŒฌWe cannot go back and say to the younger us, โ€œYour self-worth is not tied to how people love you, or donโ€™t love you.โ€ โœจ
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What we can do, is be aware that however way weโ€™ve experienced or not experienced love in the past, does not have to also be our future. โ˜€๏ธ๐Ÿƒ We can decide how weโ€™re going to see ourselves and our worth, and not see ourselves through the eyes of others, even family.
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The future is ours and we have all the power in the world to live a life and conduct relationships where weโ€™re not governed by the fear of rejection, abandonment or punishment, and be happy, always. โค๏ธ
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Video on 'What Shapes Us As Adults' is up, click on link in bio to watch ๐Ÿ”๐Ÿ’‹ #behappyalways #BHA #lovebonitomy #lbootd

I've started a GROUP for the #BHA community - https://www.facebook.com/groups/behappyalwaysxo/ - it's a space where you can talk to each other, and meet like-minded people from around the world who share your worldview on positivity and happiness! โ˜€๏ธ๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿป
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I see your comments to each other on my videos, and how you already support and encourage each other. I created the group so that you can communicate with each other more, chat and make new friends!
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Feel free to share ANYTHING that inspires you - posts, thoughts, videos, happy things! If you have challenges that you face in life, it's a space where you can ponder out loud and members of the community can comment with their perspective and support, and vice versa ๐Ÿ˜€
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It's a closed group, so join to be a member of the #behappyalways community, spread the love and inspire each other daily! - XO โค๏ธ#BHAaroundtheworld

Human beings - are we similar, or are we different? We all want to fit in, to be accepted, yet at the same time there's also this instinctual need to be recognised for the unique individuals that we are. ๐Ÿ™‹๐Ÿป
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Not everyone wants to stand out, to be different, but almost all of us want to have an identity that we can call our own. And it is this need for ourselves to be recognised, to be seen, that we use everything at our disposal to help us communicate to the world who we are. ๐Ÿ’ฌ๐Ÿ”Š
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From our fashion choices, to the ideas we embrace, to the things we believe in and fight for - they are our way of communicating who WE are. ๐Ÿ—ฃ Are we an artist? A feminist? A socialist? A human rights advocate? A gentleman? A romantic, an intellectual or an adventurer? ๐Ÿ‘จโ€๐Ÿซ๐Ÿ‘ฉ๐Ÿปโ€โš–๏ธ๐Ÿ„๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ๐Ÿ•บ
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Sometimes, in our quest to communicate our identity to the world, we also end up labelling ourselves. ๐Ÿ“ฆ We start to put ourselves in boxes, and we begin to see ourselves in a certain light, in a certain way. And because this isn't done consciously, we're not aware that we've also started labelling people, to put people in boxes, to see them in a certain light, a certain way. ๐Ÿค”
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If weโ€™ve become attached to an identity, we'll be afraid to lose it, or that people don't see it. ๐Ÿ˜“ That's why the ego comes out, because the ego is a false sense of self-assurance that we are coming across as someone who has an admirable identity. ๐Ÿ˜Œ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿผ
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Confidence doesn't come from outward achievements or successes. They do give us a measure of comfort in our identity, but to be truly confident is to be comfortable with and to understand who we are on the inside, and have no worries about communicating that to other people. โ˜€๏ธ๐Ÿƒ
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Who are who we are, and whether you see me or not - I see me - and that's enough. ๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿป When we don't define and label ourselves, we stop defining and labelling other people, and that's living with freedom, and a wonderful way to be happy, always. โค๏ธ
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Video on 'Don't Label Yourself' is up, link in bio ๐Ÿ”๐Ÿ’‹#behappyalways #BHA
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P/S: Come join me LIVE on FB @9pm (GMT+8)! We'll be talking about how to motivate ourselves to give our 100% to everything we do ๐Ÿ’ฏ๐Ÿ˜˜

We all want to love and to love, but love is the one thing that can bring the most misery and unhappiness. ๐Ÿ’”
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It's ironic how we human beings feel so empty and lost without love, yet we can also feel so upset and tortured by it.๐Ÿ˜”Perhaps the problem is how readily we accept the suffering that love brings. ๐ŸŒฌ When someone treats us badly, or wants to keep the relationship secret, or loses their temper easily, we accept it as part of the suffering that we have to go through for love. ๐Ÿค•
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Hurt and pain IS part of life, but it isn't normal when it is hurt and pain that is constantly inflicted by someone who says they love you. ๐Ÿคš๐Ÿป๐Ÿ˜“ Anyone can love greatly and passionately, but not everyone can love genuinely. A genuine love is where you allow your love to drive your actions, instead of letting your emotional state dictate what you do. ๐ŸŒช
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Love is kind, even when there is anger or frustration, love is still kind. ๐ŸƒAnd kindness doesn't hurt, it doesn't intentionally cause pain. Love is not how huge our regret is, love is not how we vow to be better the next time. Love is being able to consider another human being, and not just our own desires and emotions. ๐Ÿ™‡๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ
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Love is hard, because it goes beyond feelings, it goes beyond what we feel at that moment. Love isn't without mistakes, but it is without the intention to make someone feel bad. Love is not controlling, it inspires change through acceptance. ๐Ÿ’ซ
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People say that love makes us put someone else before us, but that is not true. We are only able to love someone genuinely when we can fully accept and love ourselves, because that is when we are not in a relationship to take, we are in a relationship to give. โœจ
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When we love someone; we don't love them for what they can give us, but for what we can give them. โ˜€ We're human, and we'll have expectations, but true, genuine love is one that chooses to bring joy, and not suffering, to the people we love because we would want them to be happy, always. โค
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Video on 'What Is Love?' is up, click on link in bio to watch ๐Ÿ”๐Ÿ’‹ #behappyalways #BHA #capedararesort #pattaya #thailand

I'm smart, but why should I work so hard for a company that doesn't care? ๐Ÿ˜
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I'm capable of more, but why should I do more when nobody appreciates it? ๐Ÿ˜ž
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Yeah I can do better, but why should I do it when thereโ€™s no incentive? ๐Ÿ˜’
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No matter where we work, or who we work for, we must remember that when we put in a 100%, it is not for the company or for our boss, it is for ourselves. ๐Ÿ™‹๐Ÿป
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Everyday, we can choose to go work with the energy and the mindset of someone who doesn't care, or we can go to work as someone who cares deeply about our quality of life. ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐ŸปOur quality of life is not defined by the work we do, or how much or little we're paid, or how awesome or not our company is; our quality of life is how we choose to spend our minutes, hours and days - are we shortchanging ourselves with the time we have by being lackluster, despondent and unhappy? ๐Ÿ˜ฉ
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Ideally, we would all love to wake up everyday looking forward to work, to be surrounded in a supportive and encouraging culture, to have bosses and colleagues who are inspiring instead of demotivating. But if we don't have all of that, or any of that, then should we just go to work everyday less bright, less positive and less happy? โ˜น๏ธโ›ˆ
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When we hold ourselves back from our potential, when we give only 50% of what we're capable of, when we're not living with the integrity that we're proud of, we're only living like a shadow of ourselves. ๐ŸŒฌ And THAT is what makes us unhappy - it is a lost sense of purpose that we feel deep down inside. We're not happy when we're not living a quality life. ๐Ÿ™‡๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ
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People who give their 100% to what they do, do it because if they know that if they don't, they're not shortchanging anybody but themselves. โšก๏ธOur attitude in work reflects our attitude towards life - and only when we learn how to create our own happiness can we truly be happy, always. ๐Ÿ’ฏโค
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Click on link in bio to watch 'Why It Pays To Do More' ๐Ÿ”๐Ÿ’‹ #behappyalways #BHA #timberlandmy #moderntrail
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P/S: A huge thank you to @find_n_decor for the beautiful framed quotes & the table lamp! It fits perfectly with the decor at @strangersat47 ๐Ÿ˜

Hello MALAYSIA! If you're in Kuala Lumpur, I'd love to meet you! โ˜€
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What do you do when you're unhappy, or feel down? โœจ Donโ€™t just wait for it to pass; take positive actions to create your own happiness! -
Join me on Saturday, 15th April as I take you through how we can create our own happiness; practices I use in my daily life to be happy, always. โค
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*Seats are limited and on a first-come-first-served basis at RM105. Register now and book your seat by emailing Susan at ooi.susan@gmail.com with the subject line #BHAinMalaysia. ๐Ÿ“ค๐Ÿ’‹ #behappyalways #BHA #createyourownhappiness

In life, we're going to come across people who piss us off. We're going to come across people whom we think are ignorant. We're going to meet rude people, angry people, violent people. ๐Ÿ˜ฎ
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If we're going to hate every single one of them, we're going to go through life hating, hating and hating. ๐Ÿ”ฅ
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Why is it that people have to be perfect, be kind and nice all the time, be generous and unselfish for us to like them, to accept them, to not judge them? ๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿปโ€โš–๏ธ We are not perfect ourselves - we have moments where we've behaved shamefully. ๐Ÿ˜ We've done things that we're not proud of. And we've had times where we've made mistakes and were wrong even when we thought we were absolutely and a 100% right. ๐Ÿ˜ฒ
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This world is huge. Billions of people walk this earth. ๐ŸŒ Of course there will be different opinions, different values and just... different people. ๐Ÿ™‡๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ Not everyone will think the way we do. People won't adhere to the same rules or courtesy. Just as we think someone is stupid they're thinking the exact same thing about us. So who's right, and who's wrong? โš–๏ธ
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Living our life everyday to the fullest is work enough, managing our own negative emotions is hard enough; we don't have to go through life being harsh and unforgiving towards people who rub us the wrong way, or who disagree with us. โ˜ ๏ธ We don't have to call anyone an asshole or a bitch - because we're all HUMAN. ๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿป๐Ÿ’ฏโœ”๏ธ
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Kindness isn't just a word. Letting go isn't just something we do to look good. โœจ They are a way of life that uplight us, that encourage people to treat other people with dignity and respect even as we don't like what we think they represent. ๐ŸŒฟ
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When you see someone behaving in a way that you don't like, don't react with hate. ๐Ÿ™…๐Ÿป We all have only a limited amount of energy, don't spend it on sending hate to people. ๐Ÿ–‹๐Ÿ“คSpend that energy on cultivating a mindset and behaviour that helps YOU be an amazing human being. ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป
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It doesn't matter what other people say or do, what matters is what we do, and what matters is if we can be absent of hate, to truly be happy, always. โค
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Click on link in bio to watch 'Why Hate Makes Us Weak' ๐Ÿ”๐Ÿ’‹ #behappyalways #lovebonitomy #lbootd #thomassabomy

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