Reminder that this is a highlight reel. I don't have it all (or even half of it) together. Up until Monday night, my room was a MESS. Like unacceptable. I spent yesterday crying. I'm wearing an ugly pair of pants today because I have a laundry bag spilling over of things I need to wash (ok, maybe the pants aren't THAT ugly, but I'm not wearing them in a way that appeals to me). I don't always dress to the 9s or perfectly apply my lipstick. Although my life is filled with love, I usually feel alone when it most counts... when I feel I need to be supported. Often, it's because I don't know how to ask, or when I do ask, people seldom say/do the right things. I live in New York City, a place some believe is one of the greatest, but I don't like it at all 50% of the time. Feel very placeless and long for a lusher, slower, greener existence. And these are the small, micro parts. I am troubled by this country. This world. These institutions. The way we relate to eachother as humans. There is a new thing that plagues me every day it seems. A moment when I witness us being anything but soft/kind to, or considerate of, the other. At times I am an active participant in the proliferation of this instead of the one who heals it, as I would like. However, just because this is a reality, it doesn't make the beauty any less true. If anything, it adds to the beauty. Here is a person who feels so much. Is troubled by much. Lives a lot of this life in her head. And still she finds time to look around. Is intentional in her search for things to be in awe of/grateful for. Remember there's a human here and all the complexities that accompany that humanity on days when you are compelled to make comparisons about the fabricated image of someone else's life. I think social media makes us feel like everyone's living this incredible existence (and it's true! You made it here; the odds of a 'You' were so slim and still you have breath to read this) and we feel the need to compare it to (what we think is) our own, significantly less incredible one. But it's not all there. It's not all that real. And you too have so much to celebrate if you would look closely enough.