veggierachel veggierachel

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Rachel Montanye  I'm Rachel.🤓 Ethical Vegan🌱 |21| Politics. 🇺🇸 SoCal.☀️ Photography.📷 Makeup Enthusiast.💄UCI Anteater 2017. 📚

Trigger Warning: Mental Illness
Today I will be sharing my third post about my struggles with mental illness in honor of #mentalhealthawarenessmonth. I was really hesitant to post this photo of me as it isn't very flattering and it isn't cheery or positive like all the rest of my photos, but that is exactly why I needed to post it. About two years ago I was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder. I have episodes of depression quite frequently and it's not beautiful. It's painful. A lot of the time I feel absolutely nothing and when I do feel, it's all hopelessness and sadness. Not feeling any emotions is probably one the worst things I have experienced. If you know me, you probably know that I am super passionate about social justice and when I have an episode of depression it makes it extremely hard to even get out of bed, let alone working towards helping human and non human animals. I feel guilty about it but when I'm in that place, I'm in a hole that takes so much time and energy to crawl out of... I've missed a lot of classes during my college career because of this illness and I started isolating myself at one point, but I'm so thankful to have understanding friends who help me push through. I've had suicidal thoughts too much to count and I hate that I think about it all the time but this is the reality of living with depression. l've tried medication and it helped for about half a year but then stopped so I stopped taking them and the withdrawal was sucky cause I had the worst headaches. Depression is not beautiful like people try to make it out to be. It hurts and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. All I can do is hope for the best because I always make it through. It's time to #endthestigma. Mental illness isn't anything to be ashamed about. Reaching out for help does not make you weak. It makes you strong and courageous. Stay strong friends. I truly believe we all have a purpose in this world, even though my anxiety and depression try to tell me otherwise constantly that I'm not good enough. We can make it through together. If you ever need to talk, I'm here for you, even if we've never met. #mentalhealth #depression #mentalhealthawareness #personal

Because girls are strong. 💪🏻Volunteered at the @gotroc 5k today. I love that @gammaphibetasorority supports such an amazing organization that builds strong girls. It's so important for girls to know their worth at a young age so they grow up to be amazing and successful women. We are important. We are strong. We will always persist. #girlsontherun #likeagirl #gphib #gphi #ucigammaphi #gammaphi #buildingstronggirls #feminism 📷: @issi.shumski

Over the moon for moonball 🌙
#gammaphi #ucigammaphi #gphi #gphib #gammaphibeta #moonball 📷: @issi.shumski

Happy 19th birthday to my wonderful best friend! 😘 I am so grateful that you are in this world and in my life. You are one of the most beautiful, intelligent, kind-hearted, and patient people I have ever met. I'm always forgetting you're younger than me because you are so mature! You give amazing advice and are always there for me and your other friends, lending support and listening, no matter what. You deserve all the best this world has to offer and I know that you will give back what you do receive because you care about this planet and all its inhabitants. I love you and look forward to being friends for years to come! I hope you have a fantastic day! ❤️😘

Love my big ❤️❤️ps campuswide was fun 😊 #gphib #gphi #ucigammaphi #gammaphi #gammaphibeta #campuswide #moonball

Trigger Warning: Mental Illness

Here's my second post about my struggles with mental illness in honor of #mentalhealthawarenessmonth. Many of you know me as funny, passionate, and friendly, but a lot of you don't know the struggles I fight with internally on a daily basis. My sophomore year of high school I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder. It was an extremely hard time for me and ever since, it has been a battle. Growing up I was always a perfectionist and was extremely hard on myself. That lead to an all consuming anxiety disorder that I have seen therapists for and have taken medication to control. A lot of people don't understand that I can't just turn it off. I turn what seems to be little things into huge ordeals because I literally imagine every single bad outcome there can be. At one point my anxiety came in multiple forms. Not only did I have GAD but I struggled with OCD. It took over all my thoughts. I was consumed with negativity of future events and that lead to panic attacks on a regular basis. After all these years I've learned to control it better without the use of medication (Not shaming anyone on meds, it helped me so much I just decided to stop). I'm proud of myself for coming so far and I still have episodes but I pull through with the help of breathing techniques and loving friends. I just want everyone to know, who doesn't have anxiety, that we are trying. We can't just snap out of it and we are working to do better. Be patient with us. And for those who do suffer, it will get better with time. Be patient with yourself. Love you all! ❤️ #mentalhealthawareness #anxiety #personal #mentalhealth #mentalillness

#AttheBigA celebrating Mother's Day!! Happy Mother's Day, mom! Gonna miss you when you move! I'm glad we all got to see a game before you go! ❤️ #angels #angelsbaseball #unlimitedangels #mothersday #angelsgame

Trigger Warning: Eating Disorder

Since it is Mental Health Awareness month, I have decided that I will post at least one post a week about the mental illnesses that I struggle with in order to #endthestigma. This post will be about my past with anorexia. I've posted about it before and I got so many messages expressing how my story has helped so many people that I wanted to share it again. March 20, 2012, I posted the first photo above on my Instagram and Facebook. I had an obsession with looking like Candice Swanepoel, a Victoria's Secret Angel. Now looking back I realize that there was never a point in comparing myself to other women. I am my own person and I'm beautiful the way I am. At the time though, all I could think about was that I had to have her body. I had extreme body dysmorphia and self-hatred for myself. It consumed me so much that I just started cutting my calories so low to the point that I was scared to eat anything at all. Before I knew it, I was down to eating less than 400 calories a day, over-exercising, and being obsessed with weighing myself. Even when I was at my lowest weight shown in all the photos after the first, I still didn't have Candice's measurements, I just look ill and my bones were all sticking out. I just want you all to know that we don't have to aspire to look exactly like someone. We can definitely appreciate the way someone looks but we are all different and we are just going to end up harming ourselves in the end if we keep trying to look exactly like another person. I know society sucks and teaches us to hate ourselves but keep your head up and push through. You are beautiful just the way you are. It may not feel like it now, but it will get better. If you need help at all or just want someone to talk to, don't be afraid to reach out to me. 😊 #recovery #anorexic #anorexia #exanorexic #ed #eatingdisorder #eatingdisorderrecovery #bodyimage #selfesteem #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawarenessmonth #mentalhealthawareness #endthestigma #edrecovery #feminism #womenempowerment #tbt #mentalhealthmonth

I missed posting this on the actual anniversary, but I still wanted to do a post... On April 26th, it was the 10 year mark for the day my grandfather died. Earlier today I was thinking about how crazy it is that ten years have passed since losing a very important figure in my life. After all this time I still miss him constantly and wonder what he would say or feel about all I've done if he was here. I wish I could've been a cardiothoracic surgeon so that I could help other families that have to suffer from heart disease just like he did but it just isn't the right path for me. Instead, I'm going to make a greater impact by representing the people of the United States with a career of public service. All though he may not have held the same beliefs as me politically, I still know that he would support and believe in me all the way. I miss you salt and pepper and I can't believe it has been ten years since I've lost you. I will always carry you in my heart though. I love you, grandpa ❤️ PS this is one of my favorite photos I have with him even though I am so young ❤️ #rip #personal #memorial

Got to have brunch with my lovely friend @stphallen and her husband at @vegenation! The food was so fantastic! #vegan #govegan #vegans #veganfriends #vegenation #whatveganslooklike #downtownvegas

Beautiful wall mural at @vegenation in downtown Las Vegas. Can't wait to try the food ❤️😍 #vegenation #vegan #hungryforchange #downtownvegas #art #govegan #eatyourveggies #artivism #artactivism

Had to take down the other post, but I had a GREAT time at the Magic Mike Live show last night! Was my first time going to a male strip show and it was definitely memorable. Thanks mom! #vegas #mmlv #magicmikelasvegas #malestrippers

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