Self-inflicting pain | Throughout the years of feeling lonely and lost, I was desperate to learn what was it that's caused me to lag behind. Today, I learnt one thing about myself: I was paralysed by fear. Fear of what? Basically, fear. The notion of fear has been lingering in my mind throughout my life and from time to time I kept asking myself where this notion came from. I searched through my childhood and tried to reason with my actions back then, as far as I could remember, but I just couldn't find the pieces to complete the puzzle. But lately I began to be honest with myself, and then people began to be honest with me too. That's where I realised that the pain that's caused by the fear was self-inflicted; I had no one to blame except myself. I blamed others for my fears but I forgot to blame myself. Such is life eh. But here's the thing: next time you're about to blame someone for your mistakes, put yourself on the hot seat first. They say, when you point a finger, 4fingers point back at you (get my pun heh). Moral of the story? "The greatest mistake is to never make one." "Unnecessary fear begets a life of worry and anxiety." "Relax lah." "4fingers is expensive." I now understand life a little better.
P/s; been wanting to find a perfect time and moment to post this picture. Today is the day I won't delete it so I can look back and say, "hey, you made the lame 4fingers joke right?" lol okay lame whatever zzzzz
Do not live in the shadows anymore.