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theunmumsymum theunmumsymum

1066 posts   271106 followers   493 followings

The Unmumsy Mum  No. 1 Bestselling Author, Freelance Writer, Blogger. Mum to 3 boys 👦🏼👦🏼👶🏼 Part of the MUMMY SOCIAL team. STORE now live. Big fan of honesty. 🏠Devon.


Oh Wilfie. Probably not one for a frame 🙈Seems we have managed a hat-trick of sicky boys - it’s just how we make them 😂 Still, refluxy fluids aside, it was lovely to catch up with Josie @mummysocial and baby Olive this morning. We kept our catch-up as classy as ever by meeting at The Range so we could browse storage boxes, hurricane vases and other homewares we don’t need

And then in the middle of all his screaming, this arrived with my sandwich 😭

Oh Wilf 🤣I take you out for a nice walk, pop into a café for an emergency feeding pit-stop (for us both) and despite you having milk*, warmth, a clean nappy and an abundance of cuddles, I’m still met with the FISTS OF FURY 😂 [*the strawberry milkshake was mine, just to be clear]

The two faces of new motherhood (swipe across for the one with slightly less glow 🤣). Yes, after 4 weeks away from social media I have just this second re-downloaded the app so it looks like I am back in the game! I have loved taking some time off to be with my boys but I am ready to stalk you all again during the night feeds as there are only so many BBC news articles you can read at 3am. I’ve typed up a little blog post about the first month (link in my profile) but it feels like there is a lot to update you on (4 weeks is an awfully long time when you’re a chronic over-sharer 🤣) so I’ll add a few more pics soon.


I am taking a little social media sabbatical for a few weeks so Wilf and I can get to know each other properly without the distraction of my phone (I’m a creature of habit and otherwise won’t be able to stop myself from replying to messages at stupid o’clock and browsing the Ibiza 2008 holiday snaps of people I’ve never met). I’m temporarily deleting all the social media apps from my phone until I’m back online, so although my profile will remain here, I won’t even be lurking 👀 which means that you won’t be able to get hold of me. I will be back soon though with an update on how it’s all going (Day 6 update: I said I hadn’t forgotten what the newborn bit was like but there is loads I’d forgotten, like being so tired you end up doing charades to act out what you’re trying to say and having a favourite boob for feeding - always the left, I can only rugby ball the right). Thanks so much for all your lovely messages and comments and Happy Christmas from the newly extended Turner tribe. Much love to you all xx

Supermarket trauma aside, there is quite honestly nothing more I want for Christmas ❤️ (except the stuff I’ve WhatsApp’d you, @james_turner8 👍). Thanks to everyone who saw my Insta stories and have messaged to suggest breastmilk to help with his gammy eye - midwife said the same, we’re giving it a go xx

Things that happened during this morning’s first supermarket adventure as a family of five:

1. Wilf did a poo before we’d even made it to the end of the fruit and veg aisle. He then woke and started frantically gumming at the trolley seat, searching for a boob (it had been at least 25 minutes since his last feed by this point, so y’know, he was starving). .
2. Jude slalomed in and out of all the people doing their Big Shop, stopping every now and again to showboat various wrestling moves (sorry to anyone who witnessed the ‘five knuckle shuffle’ and ‘people’s elbow’ next to the cold meat counter). .
3. We paid over the odds for yoghurts after letting the boys pick some that were not only extortionate but also approximately 90g of sugar per 100g. Any other day it would have been a no, but sometimes you gotta choose your battles.
4. Henry declared, with some urgency, that he too was desperate for the toilet. Jude, who insisted on tagging along for the toilet trip, then had a tantrum in the cubicle because he wasn’t allowed to wipe his brother’s bottom.
5. I remembered we’d forgotten chicken just as we got to the till, so hurried back to get some and ended up feeling a bit funny (in hindsight, 4 days post-birth was possibly a bit too soon for hurrying and certain areas of my body didn’t appreciate the rapid walking). .
6. Back at the car, Henry and Jude had a fight over absolutely nothing just as Wilf started crying.
7. James and I whispered to each other that three is actually a lot of children, reflecting specifically on the fact that we’re barely managing to call the baby by his chosen name, instead calling him Henry/Jude and one time, Misty (my Dad’s dog). .

Looking back through pics of Wilf’s birth and these two are hands down my faves, for very different reasons ... Apologies for the second photo if you’re eating your breakfast but after initially thinking 💭 I can’t share that! 🤔I realised it’s less flesh than it would be if I shared my ‘bikini body’ and represents the postpartum reality so well - I was absolutely euphoric at this point, despite walking like John Wayne and wearing an adult nappy. I cannot tell you how much we were laughing at this point either, mostly at how lucky James is. Huge shout out to the midwives at the RD&E hospital who were simply brilliant and also Siobhan @thepositivebirthmama whose hypnobirthing techniques, particularly the breathing and visualisations, made ALL the difference (I’m going to write a blog post about the birth at some stage as despite being the best one yet it’s still a bit of a story involving blood pressure issues and another tricky placenta - mine never want to come on out 🙄😂). Thanks too for all your lovely comments and messages, I’m really overwhelmed. Lots of love xx

Unbelievably proud to announce the safe arrival of baby Wilf, born just before midnight at 39 weeks. We’re back home now and all in a bit of a fog but it’s a happy fog. More by way of an update soon ❤️

Writing his classmates’ Christmas cards ...
🤞EXPECTATION: a nice, festive experience where I’d put a bit of Christmas music on, have a cuppa and a mince pie and he’d work through his class list as I praised him for the care and effort he was putting into his writing ✍️🎄🙌
😬REALITY: Looked at me like I’d asked him to write the cards using the blood of a sacrificed baby reindeer, didn’t want to turn his WWE wrestling music off (still, nothing says ‘Happy Christmas!’ quite like The Undertaker’s ‘Rest in Peace’ 🙄), decided after four minutes that he was bored (coincidentally, this was also the point at which the list of friends he wanted to write cards to was slashed by two thirds, absolutely brutal to be honest 😂), then had zero fucks to give that he’d spelt his teacher’s name wrong and lost a bogey in one of the cards (I found it before the envelope was sealed, thankfully). .

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