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themarissalee themarissalee

187 posts   1922 followers   1122 followings

Marissa Lee  23馃搷LA | "Royalty Hunter" | Facebook: ThatCurlGirl


I didn't come this far only to come this far.
I came this far so I'd be strong enough to push further.

Put in work in @mariekfitness class at @crubox this morning. Where were you?

Last weekend I discovered @jackgriffo 's Dinosaur onesie and he almost didn't get it back... PC: @broadwaybarbie

Snowboarding season is upon us and I'm ready for road trips full of music, cabins filled with my best friends, and snow capped mountains...

Thank you EVERYONE for the birthday wishes, for going out of your way to make my birthday a great one, and for the great food lol 馃挄 I'm a lucky girl, here's to a better year than last year!

I turn 23 in two days. And in these weeks leading up to my birthday I took a huge step back from everything and everyone that I was surrounding myself with, in order to reflect and reevaluate. The isolation allowed me to dig deep enough to realize why I have been drowning the last few months. I've been surrounded by so many people, yet I felt overwhelmingly alone. I've felt like the blessings in my life had a large shadow cast over them from the series of unfortunate events that I have endured. Here's what I've learned...
馃専馃専YOUR PURPOSE IS A PROCESS馃専馃専 If you fight the process, you are refusing a beautiful future.
Do not FEAR the process, you cannot fear the trials placed on your path...You must see these obstacles for what they are, PREPARATION for who you need to BECOME to get where you want to go. Because make no mistake, who you are today can't handle what God has for you in a few years, or even months, if you fear growth. How you handle these small challenges will determine if the universe gives you something bigger and better, because "bigger and better" comes with bigger and BADDER challenges!
Life's trials are like a lion, but keep your faith and run TO not FROM the roar, letting your inner wolf guide you.
That being said, I've made a few more tweaks and changes to my character, my circle of human beings, and my mindset.
I now run on faith, NOT fear. I recognize that God has blessed me with a platform that I will only successfully operate if I make these internal changes. I now draw my confidence from all of the "unfortunate events" that I have overcome. Those of you who have misjudged and underestimated me, are about to be reintroduced to a new and improved woman. All of my struggles have prepared me for the next adventure. All of my pain has prepared me for this moment.

@shanboody said it best. The way each and every one of us loves, and prefers to be loved, is unique. Have you ever bought a plant and did your best to water it everyday, and still it withered and died? Why does this happen when you poured so much time, love, and effort into this flower? Well we buy these plants and as soon as we get home we usually throw out the directions. Each plant has a unique way to show it love, just like each of us, so that it can flourish. Some only require watering once a month, so you end up drowning it. Others require a specific amount of sunlight. Love would would be much easier if we came with directions. So here are a few of mine. #HowtoLoveMe #Challenge #Shanboody 鈼解椊鈼解椊鈼解椊鈼解椊鈼解椊鈼解椊鈼解椊鈼解椊鈼
What does your Saturday night look like? My night is full of planning/plotting moves, new playlists, face masks, and drinking as much water as humanly possible.馃ぃ Preparing my skin for Monday night when I will be back at @Crubox going H.A.M on the bag!馃馃 I've got 4 people coming with me so far, so who else wants to break a sweat with me? DM for details 馃惡馃惡馃惡馃惡馃惡馃惡

Blessed to be back in the Den 馃槉 Terry's class is always a blast! If you haven't been to @crubox yet, or want to go again, DM me and we can sweat together!

I am excited to announce that @crubox is officially open to the public! 馃馃惡馃棧**HOWLS** 馃槂馃槃
Follow the directions in this video by following us here on the gram to stay updated! Click the link in our bio to book your very own bag 馃 And get ready to #FightWithThePack 鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍
Check out our pack leaders... @gee_garcia7 @savageandspice @mariekfitness @terry_wapp @apolloniaturturro

Coolin with Cuz...

Tuesday September 26, 2017 / 12:46am...
馃敼馃敼 And then, there were two. Manic bipolar depression. Like many mental illnesses, MBD is often made out to be NBD (no big deal). But it caused me to turn to self harm when I was somewhere around 8 years old. There were no outside influences that caused me to use this as an outlet, but one day I started cutting my fingertips in the middle of class, and it made the self hate that I was too young to understand seem a little less overwhelming. My scars then migrated to my wrists. I left minimal scarring because I was a model, a ministers daughter, a cheerleader, etc. Roles that made me feel required to be happy 24/7, so I had to be sure that I showed up to auditions, church, and the Jeff football games seemingly unbroken. In this last year alone I tried taking my own life, I was raped/hospitalized, I lost family and countless friends, I have been (and still am) repeatedly misunderstood. My pocket knife became my travel companion, and I locked myself in bathrooms to open new wounds. Here I was lost on this seemingly endless journey to myself, searching for any sign of a purpose. I went from a young person with a strong sense of self, to doubting whether the world needed me, at all.
A few weeks back I noticed that there were no open wounds on my wrists. In fact there were only two or three scars left. Look, with or without Bipolar Depression, it鈥檚 so easy to drown in our negative thoughts. But here鈥檚 some advice from someone who鈥檚 started ignoring the light at the END of the tunnel (fuck that cheesy line that everyone throws at you). Now notice the windows on the sides of your tunnel that let in their own light. Our demons will always try dragging us down. You鈥檒l hear that you don鈥檛 have what it takes. Life will happen to you. You will fall, but you'll get back up. People will make it their mission to create a false image of who you truly are. It's time to accept that being misunderstood is a part of life. But each day we have a choice to either focus on the immense darkness in our tunnels, focus on the bit light at the end of that tunnel, or we can look around and notice that we are already bathing in so much light.

This is her. The world broke her down a little bit, so she's working on building herself back up. She's passionate and wants to add value to other people's lives. She would prefer kindness over savagery, but her smile does not make her weak. She sacrifices, she fights, and she overcomes everything that tries to destroy her. Every night she wants to love, with every sunrise she wants to love, and all she wants to do is make the lives around her better with her presence. That is her. 鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍
I just want to start off by saying thank you. I love you all, I read your messages, and while I may not be perfect I do my best to constantly be a beacon of hope, love, and positivity for you guys. 鉁 Yesterday someone told me that they loved the raw, openness of my social media. I share with you guys the darkest parts of my life, as well as the darkest parts of myself, because we live in a world where everyone tries to hide the bad and place all of their positive events and attributes center stage. But that's not what life is, life is ugly and that's what makes the beautiful moments that much richer. 馃馃挄
鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍I slowed down on some of my raw, open posts because multiple people told me that social media isn't the place for these types of talks. But I do believe that this is the exact place to have these conversations. Because I have received messages on here (and on my Facebook page) from people telling me that my opening up about my traumas and my own battle with depression, have inspired them to get help themselves! Some have gone as far as to tell me that they "put the pills down" after one of my posts about my experience with depression. You guys are all such beautiful souls. And while I may only have a small following for now, it's allowed me to get to know and genuinely care for many of you. Thank you for your feedback! 鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍鈻笍
PC馃摳: @mychalalee

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