thegabrielleo thegabrielleo

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Gabrielle O.  #tinyvictories ๐Ÿ’ซ โœ‹ Haven't stepped on a scale since 2.19.2018 ๐Ÿถ Hot dog mamรญ ๐Ÿฉ Donut babe ๐ŸŒฟ Seattle, WA ๐ŸŒน ED Recovery โ€ข Self Discovery

*Also empowered.
A reminder that you don't have to post pictures without pants on to feel empowered, or to amplify the fact you love your body. Actually, you don't have to post pictures at all to feel these things!
In the past week, I've been feeling less than empowered. Between work, relationships, self care and the slightest attempts at mindfulness, I've been in over my head. Feeling crowded out of my own mind with all my insecurities & doubts. And that will dampen my inner monologue and make me feel less than powerful.
But how you outwardly display your empowerment, your sense of self, your values, will be vastly different than how I do it, or how your neighbor does it!
Sometimes life will smack ya down and you will feel weak of the mind, soul, and body. Just know that everything is a cycle, everything ebbs and flows. Roll wit it beetches ๐ŸŒŠ๐ŸŒŠ๐ŸŒŠ #tinyvictories

These perfect @shop.kiddbell panties used to fit a whole lot better but BODY happens so whatever.
Live your best life.
Don't let anyone's opinion rob you of your confidence & experiences as a woman.
Be respectful, but don't ever apologize for doing YOU.
Love yo self first, be your #1 fan before you try to promote someone else to that position.
Speak kind words about yourself errrreday as a part of your daily essentials.

How I'm tryna be this summer โ˜€๏ธ
No bra.
No filters making my skin look like the glaze on a Krispy Kreme donut.
No wearing makeup to the beach because I give a shit how I look when I'm laying out in the sun.
No body shaming people (& myself) whose bodies don't align with the socially constructed idea of a "beach body".
Love yo sun-soaking selfโ˜€๏ธ

This is for everytime I flinched when a guy touched the soft skin of my tummy (especially 30lbs ago when the "soft" was a figment of my imagination)
This is for everytime I made up an excuse to turn the lights off before having sex.
This is for everytime I didn't come because I was too concerned about what my body looked like to actually enjoy the ENTIRE process of sex.
This is for every woman who let's her body dictate her sexuality, and who thinks extra skin on her body makes you less worthy of pleasurable sex.
If you struggle to feel comfortable during sex because of your body, speak openly with your partner about your insecurities. Chances are, your partner will have insecurities of their own. If you feel like you can't openly discuss these things, ask yourself why? Then ask yourself why you think you deserve to have your sexual needs unfulfilled? Twice a week or twice a day, you deserve to orgasm, you deserve to be held, you deserve a healthy sex life, and don't ever let your beautiful bitchin' body stand in your way ๐ŸŒน

Let your body be, exist ๐ŸŒน

I don't post a lot of these pictures anymore, but here's a #tbt for ya!
I know I blame men for a lot of the downfalls in today's society, but here's one who has shown me nothing but support and a tireless platform for me to feel empowered on. He met me at a very low point in my life, and never batted an eye at all the demons I've had to reconcile with ๐ŸŒน.
His constant crave to learn, to grow, to refine, are just a few reasons I keep coming home to this kid ๐Ÿ˜˜ .
#love #partners #tbt

Nudity doesn't make you a slut. Showing skin does not denote your values. Dress codes in schools are bullshit.
The attitude society has about the skin on our bodies (skin, something we ALL have) is so whack, and it perpetuates the ongoing, overwhelming theme of patriarchy, and the double standards held for men. Why is it okay for men to show skin and nipples, and not women? Who actually decided that men are allowed to walk topless in public and women are not? TAKE A WILD GUESS, IT STARTS WITH AN 'M'.
I've had many people point out that I have a "nice body" so it must be easy to take pictures of myself or easy to accept my body? Well thanks, but that really is neither here nor there. I struggle with thinking thoughts of compassion about my appearance every day. I could give less of a shit if my DM's are bursting with compliments, if I don't compliment myself and be my greatest ally, I feel worthless.
"Nice bodies" shouldn't be the only bodies that are applauded and admired. Consider what specific attributes make someone beautiful in your eyes. Why did you choose those attributes? Where did you learn to identify what is beauty and what is not?
Nudity is not the problem, our bodies are not the problem. Continuously biting the hook of the line society is casting is the problem. Don't get hooked y'all ๐ŸŽฃ #allbodiesarebeautiful #stopslutshaming
*Disclaimer: you don't have to post pictures of yourself on IG to feel empowered. You don't need to draw strength from unapologetically taking your clothes off and running around your house naked. Different people will feel empowered in different ways, wearing different things (or not wearing anything) & this is okay. You don't have to relate to me or like my pictures to feel empowered by my message.

Another one for women & men with boobs๐ŸŒน
For most of my post puberty life, I've had large breasts. Like, long, heavy, 34DD kinda boobs. ๐ŸŒน
I'll admit, in a bra they looked sexy & bangin'. But when I would take my bra off in front of a guy, he'd often grab them and try to push them up as if they'd stay in "the right" place if he held them up long enough. ๐ŸŒน
They're long, they're saggy, they're always falling to the side, and usually my nips are lookin in two entirely different directions. Losing a severe amount of weight in the midst of my ED caused them to be two bean bags without beans, and then gaining weight recently caused them to fill up again, but they still have always retained their oblong shape.
My breasts have never fed a child, they have been through a hell of a lot, and will probably experience a lot more in my years of womanhood. While I don't believe boobs define a woman, I am proud these two hang off me, and no person or bullshit societal standards will take away that pride.

A common exercise that therapists will have you practice to get through anxiety attacks, trauma flashbacks, or just moments of feeling yucky, is to imagine a place.
The place should be one of great comfort, no negative associations, just peaceful familiarity. You should be able to look around this space (for me, it's my old house in New York), and imagine the knick-knacks on the shelves, the fabric of the couch, the old Buffalo Bills clock on the wall, and the framed collection of Yankee golf balls underneath. This place should be vivid, and comfy. โ€ข
Okay. As you look around the safe space you have chosen, allow a word to come into your head that is representative of your safe space. For me, it's 'wood' because of all the heavy wood furniture and the giant wood paneled record player that's in the living room of the house.
At times of duress, you'll find me chanting WOOD in my head to pull me out of whatever negative mind loop I'm stuck in, and transport me to a place of solace. I implore you to try this. In fact, I was prompted to post this because I just had to use my "wood chant" on my way home from work.
It should take about 15 minutes to thoroughly identify the place of comfort, explore it so there's no hidden skeletons, and then allow a word of association to enter your mind. This word will be a cherished secret weapon for when you need to escape. ๐ŸŒฟ

A story.
A lot of my old clothes, sizes XS & 00, are major triggers for me. I try to fit into my XS button ups, it's extremely fucking tight, and I'll try to talk the mirror into making the blouse fit by sucking in my tummy and looking at myself from different angles. Still nope. & now I just wasted 45 minutes looking at a stupid blouse that I KNEW didn't fit.

When I first started seeing my therapist, I knew it was a perfect fit because she used the following analogy: "We are going to unpack some shit. And I mean like, open your closet and pull everything out onto the floor & dance on it. We're going to look at each item, and see how it makes us feel and if we really need that one. Now, after we unpack everything, we are going to have a huge ass mess in the middle of the floor. It's going to be overwhelming, unavoidable, and it may seem hopeless at times. BUT, we are going to clean the fuck up." ๐ŸŒน

Not only did that resonate deeply with me because I LOVE organizing, but also because clothing has also been an issue with me. I've always been triggered by getting ready in the morning, especially when I was thin, because of the BD. I had (have) so many factors distorting my perception of how I look, I honestly have no clue what the fuck I actually look like lol. ๐ŸŒน

But to some degree, we all have a skewed image of what we look like because we're all so damn in tune with everyone else. Everything is comparative, we think in terms of I'm thinner than... I'm curvier than... I'm shorter than... ๐ŸŒน

So if you're holding onto a shirt that fit you in 10th grade (me) like "omg I just want to be this size again, maybe if I just BLAH BLAH BLAH" you need to toss that ish like byeeeee โœŒ๏ธ

Why is this girl running around her house taking pictures without pants? Does she own pants? Do we need to start a GoFundMe campaign for her so she can buy pants? These are all questions you may be asking, but fucking NOPE.
I try to take pictures of myself every day that make me feel good, sexy, unique & unapologetically ME.
I would probably have died before I posted this on Instagram a few months ago, because my arm is "too fat" and I can see the cellulite on my thighs. I would have told myself a hundred reasons why I couldn't post this.
But now? Fuck it. I'm feeling fine as hell and I refuse to keep that feeling to myself.
Honestly, everyday is a struggle to stay positive about the changes I see in my body. And sometimes I even miss being a size 0 and seeing my hip bones through my leggings. But what I wouldn't trade for the world is this feeling of FREEDOM and happiness.
Not caring what anyone thinks because the only approval stamp I need is my own! And I fucking approve this message โœ”๏ธ

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent - E. Roosevelt
Your body is sacred, your body is yours.
Society, social media, celebs, loved ones, & friends, will attempt to shape you and your feelings about your body. Don't let them without your consent.
Compassion, acceptance, & respect are excellent indicators of the intentions behind people's words and actions, but also YOUR words and actions.
Are you saying kind words to yourself? Speaking words of acceptance and respect to yourself?
Don't let yourself make YOU feel inferior

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