There's some nights I really wished you were here. The shattered fragments of words stay lodged in my throat. I scream into pillows, I punch things, I throw things across the room and break them, I cry, oh god I cry thousands of tears. of course it doesn't help in the long run, I just end up with shattered things across my bedroom floor and blood dripping from my knuckles. But what am I supposed to do when I can't run to you anymore? What am I supposed to do? I've done everything i can, and I'm not okay. I've ran, I've ran to new places, I've ran to new things, I changed my hair plenty of times, I've listened to different music, I've read new books, I've tried new makeup, I've tried different clothes, I've explored places, I've done a lot of stupid things, I've done a lot of great things, but my brain won't let my heart be satisfied, it's like I'm running and running, but never knowing what I'm searching for. I was so used to you being a constant in my life, I was always going going going.. but you're no longer constant, you're not taking a break, you're gone, but my brain hasn't stopped although my heart did. So what do I do, with blood dripping from my knuckles and shattered things across my bedroom floor..