tak.tahu tak.tahu

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p i j n  healing my own scars using fingers tainted with blood stain.

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This going to be a long post, here we go. A few days ago my close friend had encountered some unpleasant events in her life, instead of posting it on social media she decided to do something called "Internet Detox". It's basically not posting anything for a period of time - like a hiatus and also deleting some people from her account. Apparently it has given her a very good feedback. She gets the sense of self acceptance and in no longer need for validation from other people regarding her life - whether good or bad. She's to one who lives, fights and survives in it.
Well, I'm intending to do the same, for those who are being unfollowed by me - worry not. I am going to write an elaborate reasons why.
1. We don't communicate after we followed each other, yes - just like Charlie Puth' song, we don't talk anymore. What's the use of social media when all you do is stray from people instead of connecting with them?
2. You followed me just so you can send bad comments or talk about my life behind my back. This is true and I don't mind, they are called haters. But what hurts me the most is that I am befriended with these kind of people who just want to let me down. I have enough of negativity in my life. So it's time to move on.
3. We used to be friend but then we had a fight and you hold grudges. Please, don't be this kind of person. It's time to move on from all bad things that happened in the past. But well, I'm just giving an advice. If I think you're still holding grudges against me what can I say? Even god is hated by Satan.
I'm going to be on a hiatus for a little while, my life is drastically changing in these past few months - both good and bad. To those who get unfollowed, I don't mean to hurt you - I just need to detox negativity out of my life. If you feel offended or you think we are friends but I mistook it, or haven't gotten a follow back from me, please write to me - on my DM or Blog. I am always open. Thank you so much for all the people who has been supporting me all these time. I am more than grateful. No heartfelt - guys! I am also won't be making my Instagram private because it is linked to my blog and this is the only Instagram I have. Love, B.

that's what happens with life you know, you have plans about going to Disneyland or moving in together or going to IKEA to buy a set of bed but you never planned to fall in love and when it ends it breaks you in pieces. But what I learned more in life is that, the more heartbreak you get - the more you realized that all these time you're just, alone. in the meantime there are people who comes in your life, but in the end they'll leave - nothing lasts forever. When they're no longer to fight for you - the way you did for them, or as simplest as wanting you to stay, then leave. And when you've reached the point, in which I am standing on right now. I hope you'll find what I called enlightenment. Best of luck to all of you, lone fighters.

I'm only out to hurt myself. when realizing I'm having a bleeding wounds I demand people to put salt in it. I should've put my heart on the leash, should've kept locking my own door to keep me from going.

And I've inked my skin with the thoughts of you, yet I couldn't do without seeing the tan on my fourth finger. If this ever crossed your mind, I wonder if I'll feel guilty if I did the same to you.

When your rooster crows at the break of dawn
Look out your window, and I'll be gone
You're the reason I'm a-traveling on
But I wish there was somethin' you would do or say
To try and make me change my mind and stay
But we never did too much talking anyway
But don't think twice, it's all right.

and it's always been you, the one who never had a good enough reason just to let me stay.

wenn du wüsstest, ich brauche nur ein bißchen Moment mit dir bevor ich mich verliere.

you gave me infinity within the only numbered days we spent together, and I am beyond grateful for that.

Ik voel dat wij kosmisch verbonden zijn ⭐️✈️

"you're nobody's hero. you can't go out there and try saving lives when in reality you're just digging your own grave, deeper. you have nobody but yourself to save. wake up!"

There are times when liquors can't help downing your problems, when sleep can't heal your restlessness, when inking your skin isn't a vain and it gives you no pain, when crying your heart out doesn't fix the ache, when looking at old pictures and feeling nothing but agony, when taking ibuprofen yet can't help with your headache.

You'll wonder if there's a way to my heart but truth is: it all lies on how you treat me.

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