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#worhtless

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I've been dating my bf for almost 2 years and it's been amazing.
For me.
I always unconsciously made him feel like he wasn't reaching some expectation even though he's the most amazing and patient human being on the planet. He knows I have some issues because of my emotionally abusive father, but he's shown me nothing but patience and kindness and love. But I still made him feel worthless.
A few days ago we broke up, cried all day, then I convinced him to give me a couple months to change things. When we broke up, I said " I can't lose someone as amazing as you." And he replied with "But I'm not amazing. I'm completely average." That's when I realized how much I've neglected him and his feelings. And somehow he doesn't even seem to realize how awful I've treated him.
I can't lose the love of my life. I'm going to therapy starting this week, and am going to do everything in my power to make him feel loved. I'm determined to do whatever it is I need to do to make him happy. I don't want him to find someone else to heal him from what I've done, I want to change and heal him myself. What else can I do?
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#CY: Give him time to heal. His wound is not just a cut, he has been touching the same cut every day. We often dont realise how little things can hurt someone so much. As you mentioned, you did things that you are not proud of, those things must have scared his body for good. Now it will take time to heal. Wait for him to respond dont rush into things.
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#Confess #Confession #ConfessYourself #CYNotes #SecretLetter #quote #love #hate #relationship #counselling #psychology #confidence #heal #time #happy #breakup #wanthimback #emotional #abusive #father #parents #kind #worhtless #badtreatment #cry #cried #regret #repent

I'm nothing. I have absolutely no one. I'm lying here alone in the dark and everything hurts. But I have no one. No one to call. No one to help. No one even wondering about me somewhere.
I'm still not dead and I can't bear it.
It's not worth being alive. It'll never be worth it. I feel so shit and worthless and guilty.
Why can't I just die?
I don't want to be alive. No one wants me to be alive. Why can't I just die?
#suicide #suicidal #alone #lonely #depressed #depression #worhtless #ed #eatingdisorder #fucked #pieceofshit #mentalhealth #mentalillness #worthless #anxiety #anxietdisorder #nothingtolivefor

Hab endlich Ferien Und fliege heute für 4 wochen auf die Philippinen um verwandte und meine alten Freunde zu besuchen😍 für die nächsten 4 Wochen wird aber dadurch wahrscheinlich fast gar nichts bis gar nicht kommen, weil ich nicht so gutes Internet haben werde....😢
#Q : was macht ihr so in den Ferien .
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#depri #hurt #fuckedup #fucku #esistesnichtwert #selbsthass #nichtgutgenug #hass #hurt #broken #why #kaltherzig #ichliebedich #fucklife #hatemyself #scheissleben #wahr #true #fvckschool #son #sad #foreveralone #scars #recovery #worhtless #ichvermissedich #overthinking  #stillinlove #selbstverletzungen #psychoarmy

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