T-3 DAYZ 😍😭✈️ #desertbound #natureislife #ifisleepdoestimegofaster🤔
2 years ago I left the Grand Staircase Escalante after spending 96 days secluded in the wilderness with a group of people who changed my life forever. As some of you know I suffer from Borderline Personality Disorder and have for as long as I can remember. There is still such a stigma around mental illness that it is scary to put it out there for people to know, but in order for it to be normalized
I feel like speaking about it is a big part in doing so...that being said, a couple years back it got to a point where I was really losing sight of who I was and I had no idea how to cope with my mental illness. I was fortunate enough to be able to receive some of the best help in the world in southern Utah regaining my sense of self, learning how to manage my emotions and learning how to build healthy relationships (among SO many other things). Coming back into society was challenging and it took me a good year to be able to feel the way I felt in the wilderness, in society and successfully incorporate the tools I learned into my everyday life. This place holds a special significance in my heart because this is the area in which mind became so much clearer. It is possible to recover from mental illness although it is not easy and it definitely took years of work and hours of therapy, it is beyond rewarding. I am living in a new city with my first love and he motivates me everyday to be the best I can (maybe a little too much somedays ;)) . I have also found fitness again, which has completely changed the way I feel about myself and given me life-- but that story is for another time. I have never been happier with myself and my life so I am rewarding myself by going back to the place I have dreamed of going back to ever since I left. Excited doesn't even begin to describe the way I feel about going back here and to explore the areas around the Grand Staircase Escalante which I have never seen.