#TransformationThursday on a Wednesday 😅
First pic on the left- 23 y/o Alex 🌚 this was when I only did cardio. If for some reason I couldn’t get my running in, I’d feel like a failure. I ran because I wanted to be skinny and for some reason I convinced myself that I would love myself if I was smaller 🤦🏽♀️ I was also mentally not ok. That day, I was hanging out with someone who was a fucking cancer in my life. The only reason I kept him around was because I was physically attracted to him and desperately seeked his approval at the expense of my self respect 🙃 my anxiety was high that day because school was starting and I felt lost. I didn’t feel like I could function properly in society/contributed to society, what Durkheim suggests as a leading cause of suicide, shout out to sociology for putting me on game ✊🏾 First pic on the right- taken a few days ago before vacation. My self esteem is a lot better, I cut a lot of toxic people out of my life, I’ve put on weight (AND I AM FOR ONCE PERFECTLY FINE WIDDIT BECUZ THICC) and I no longer put myself in situations where I will emotionally/mentally be hurt. I also only run when I really feel like it (once/twice a week), I lift heavy weights and I manage my time better and I don’t freak out if I miss a training day (worst shit will happen in life b 🦄)
Second pic on the left- just to show that self love is a journey and it’s ok if you fall off sometimes. June 2017. My mental health was kinda eccentric at this point. I no longer have fatal thoughts but I was harnessing a lot of pent-up aggression/sadness. My self love for myself grew oddly, which was great. However, I’ve always tried to be way stronger than I need to be so I never seized opportunities to talk shit out with people. I took the pic and remembering thinking, wow my makeup came out ugly and cried lol. I thought it was reflecting how I felt.
Second pic on the right- I’m fucking happy as can be lol. Plain and simple, I forced myself to like the person I saw in the mirror 💕
Self love is really the answer to everything. When you respect yourself, when you love yourself, you really become the best version of yourself. Seize your moment babies ❤️