"Breathtaking isn't it ?" Annie breathlessly sighs whilst staring in awe at a breathtaking waterfall. "Absolutely…" Charlie breathlessly replies whilst staring in awe at the side of her head.
And it is worth pausing here to take a breath of our own.
As, amazingly, 'The Recall' (also called 'Final Recall' depending upon where you live) was originally designed to be watched as a three screen panorama which almost totally surrounded it's audience.
We obviously will not be seeing it aided with such wondrous technology, so can only dream whilst watching it ourselves of just how truly breathtaking the side of a young woman's head could possibly look if we were fully encased within it.
Whilst we are distracted by such earlobe-based reveries of the imagination however, little do Annie and Charlie realise that the breathless breaths they are currently breathtakingly taking may well be their last - for here be aliens.
Luckily though here also be Wesley Snipes, the writers don't bother giving his character a name, and he can help them with the use of his gurning muscles and incredibly gurning face.
Unfortunately, despite this help, it is not long before Annie and Charlie are abducted to the mothership where the aliens then - somewhat coquettishly - strip Charlie of all of his clothes except for a pair of jeans which, unlike Wesley, soon develop a character of their own by clinging to his hips so tantalisingly it categorically proves there is no gravity in space.
Once more, dear reader, we can only sadly dream of those astonishing three screen possibilities.
So do Annie and Charlie survive with their well-sculpted bottoms and breathtaking side views intact? You can probably answer that question yourself but, thanks mainly to those tenacious trousers, it is a story which is never knowingly undersold.
It is breathtakingly, weirdly watchable - if you, like me, can use your three screen imagination to get you through the really boring bits.
Artwork: Charlie trying to recall the breathtaking side of Annie's head whilst wearing his breathtaking jeans.