A love letter from my ♥️
I sit cross legged, rosewater and geranium diffusing into my home's air. I breathe in deeply. I notice how I feel; a bit of tension in my neck from a poor workout the other day, some hunched shoulders from 15 years of repetitive strain, and also a deep contentment that fills up and occupies my body right into my soul. And the latter is all due to my sobriety. See I can appreciate the baby cardinal at my feeder now, I can identify birds, trees, flowers. Something some would scoff at, or say that's 'no big deal' but to me, it is my life. It is everything. The noticing. The appreciation of people, all kinds of beautiful humans that I may not have had on my radar when I was too busy drowning in the sea of my story. That old book is one I leave shelved, it only comes out when it is necessary to facilitate the healing of another. I do not dwell there anymore.
I breathe in the geranium perfumed air, I tune in to my highest self using only breath, intention and gratitude...for it is grace that opens the door to that room. I know now that it cannot be forced. I know now that the key only appears in my hand when I surrender to it. There is a big name for what I am talking about. Some call it GOD. I call it, an indivisible whole. A thriving, changing, vibrating place that will disappoint us as well as lift us up. So if you aren't sure about your sobriety, or if you aren't sure about anything at all - just take a few moments of your day to cultivate your own practice of connection...the kind that isn't found in a needle, a pill, a warm body, a credit card, a donut or a bottle.
It's all around you.
It is you.
Start weaving a new tale...one that stars you as the victor, you are holding in your very cells all the power that you will ever need and you will never ever in a million billion years find it outside of yourself in any substance or external thing of any kind.
I love you. It's time you started loving yourself. NO CONDITIONS.
*Bonus photoshopped pic of me as a forest lol 😂 △