3 months ago today, I started the recovery process from throat surgery. It was not an easy time for my husband and I, but with the help, love, and support of our community, we were able to move forward with the best outcome possible.
The months prior to my surgery, I was unable to eat solid foods, sleep, or have comfortable conversation with people I love. My weight hit an extreme low of 98 lbs. and I felt like a lifeless heap of bones. My flares kicked into high gear, my anxiety was at an all time high, my nerves were shot, and I spent weeks upon weeks in bed extremely ill. Through it all, I started to lose hope and trust in my body. 5 years of chronic illness topped off with 9 months of throat symptoms was just too much to handle. Fear and depression kicked in and I simply shut down. If it weren't for the strength, compassion, and hard work of my husband, I'm not sure where I would be today. Sometimes life gets too busy and we forget to say thank you to the ones that hold us up the most. Thank you @hymanjd I sure love you so darn much.
While throat surgery (or any surgery, for that matter) is something that I never want to endure again, the process shined much needed light on all that I'm thankful for. For 2+ months now, I have been able to eat solid foods by myself and while in the company of others. There's no embarrassment or fear attached to eating. I can sleep without sitting in a complete upright position. More importantly, I have renewed hope and trust in my body. While there are a great many things out of balance in this temple of mine, surgical recovery showed me that there are a great deal of things still working. This body is not betraying me. It wants to see me get better and I fully believe that it has the capacity to do just that. Trust and hope are a beautiful combination.
This week, we're back at Mayo meeting with my surgical team to review results from my surgery, as well as, several appointments with my long term care team to discuss possible treatment options for my on-going immunological/hematological concerns. While we've only just begun to scratch the surface on my healing path, things aren't fully resolved, and there is a great