Today I went through something hard. Really really hard.
I remembered details of a hardship in my past.
I wept over the brokenness in the heart of the girl you see in this picture, that girl is me 3 years ago.
3 years ago I experienced abuse from someone I should have been able to trust.
3 years ago I had worked so hard to make sure no one knew the depth of pain I was in.
3 years ago I stopped pursuing God.
3 years ago I sacrificed the childlike growth in exchange for human approval.
3 years ago I numbed myself from feeling conviction.
3 years ago I let someone have complete control over my life and my decisions.
3 years ago I handed over the rights and the reigns to my own body.
3 years ago I convinced myself to believe that my own worth was no more than the price of a DVD.
3 years ago I allowed myself to become an object, and itemized.
That face you see in the picture was so hurt beyond her knowledge. She hurt so many people, she let herself be hurt by so many people, and she gave up on fighting for what was right.
Some of you might think this is ridiculous for me to post, and it might make some of you uncomfortable and that's okay, you can keep scrolling. But my hope is that somehow, someone will see this and realize that they have access to freedom.
Whoever you are that is out there, a young girl following me on Instagram, or even an Ozark student who is "supposed to have their lives together by now" and have yet to mutter a word about their mistakes, I hope you realize that you are SO deeply loved, and that Jesus really really wants to take care of you and your wounds.
I didn't believe that it was possible for me to experience healing at this depth. I thought my wounds were far too many in number and intensity.
But I made a choice. I took a step out in blind faith - and I wasn't even motivated in Christ to do it honestly. I just knew something was wrong for so long that I had to do something different.
HE. HAS. BLESSED. THAT.
The Rescuer has done as He has promised.
Sweet girl, Sweet boy, wherever you are... Step out soon and experience the power and love of Jesus, He loves you SO much.