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“Saying no to find a better way.” I’m downsizing and possibly completely shutting down my little sewing business. This is pretty heartbreaking for me as I’ve put so much time, love, effort, money, etc into this.
However, when I started it my goals were 3 things. 1. To have a bit of income so when my husband leaves the military in a few years, I can help to contribute to living expenses. 2. To help raise money for various causes. 3. To make things that provide comfort, peace and happiness to children and adults.

Out of those 3 I only accomplished 1- sending things to provide comfort.
I’ve come to realize that I am not good at setting up a business myself. It’s not a natural fit for me to choose prices, ask someone for payment, etc. If I sell something, I need to not be in the position of doing things like that. It’s uncomfortable for me and I couldn’t quite get past that. Also- I often charged LESS than what it cost me to make and ship and item because I wanted people to be happy and feel content with their purchase.
I need to not be in that position. I tried to push past it, but it’s just not something that I could get comfortable doing.
In the long run, I have spent thousands of dollars over the last 2 years trying to get things going. The fabric, the shipping, the every little detail. This is not helpful to my family, or other causes I want to contribute to.
Also- I have some health probs and when I sew too much, my body hurt so badly. This means I’m not going to be able to do this as a full time thing. I am really hyper mobile in my hips and a bit in my shoulders so when I’m working on things and sitting on the floor (where I work the most) I’m actually really aggravating these bendy parts and what people do not see is my lying in bed at night in pain because my back and hips and shoulders hurt so much. I didn’t expect that to be a huge problem, but unfortunately, it is.
We are moving into a home that will likely be 1/3 of the size of the one we are in now. I cannot have a whole room for fabric and sewing stuff. I need to downsize. A lot.
Continued in comment 👇🏻

My Day 40 on 2/24/18 of #soulshaker I get up 7-8am time range daily, but it's still SO hard for me to get moving in the mornings. It used to be an all physical thing, but as I've healed adrenal fatigue and a Epstein-Barr virus flare the past few years, I'm more energized. Mentally and emotionally, I still have to give myself a gentle push to get going in the mornings. I love my fuzzy magenta robe and sipping on decaf coffee and watching the squirrels and birds during breakfast. I listen to music or a podcast. Since my mom passed in 2015, my mornings are like this. I know eventually I will get moving quicker. #soulshakerdailyadventure

My Day 40 on 2/24/18 of #soulshaker class. I drew these cards and they're fitting. I think about how I used to really cling to physical items as a way to have "proof" of things like having love, fun, or good in my life. I don't need the physical items as much any more. My memories are inside me. I still have a bit of releasing work to do with memorabilia type of clutter. Ugh! It's hard stuff, but worth it for my inner peace. I've realized lately I am decluttering in my mind even when I'm not doing the labor of it. Then, I usually do the physical work after I've become accepting of what I want clear and release. #soulshakerintentions

Soul Shaker Day Five 21 years of organized negatives. It's time! #soulshaker

“She Calls Me Her Sunshine Because She Spent Too Many Days In The Rain.” JmStorm • •@jmstormquotes • •

#Sunshine ☀️ #Mine #WindInMyHair 🌬#SunOnMyFace #fridayfeelz #SmittenKitten #Infatuated 💘 #SoulShaker #HeartBeating 🖤#SweatDripping#FireBreathing 🔥 #LoveGiving#KittyLife#DarkSide#Platinum #HazelGreen #SnakeBites 🐍#DevilsCandy 🍬🍭 #BlackOrWhite #ScorpioWoman ♏️🦂 #TakeMeToTheBottom 🌊 #wildwoman #GoingUp#TwentySix ⚁⚅

Soul Shaker Day 44.

I just did a fb live video which was pretty much terrifying to me, but sometimes I have things I want to say and I can’t rest until I get them out.
Sometimes doing something scary and brave feels terrifying and amazing at the same time.
I know some people do not think a video is scary, but anyone who knows me well, knows that I have some pretty big social anxiety. I get that nervous just seeing friends of mine and meeting new people too. This is probably rooted in not feeling good enough. I’m working on that. 😎

Every time I reach out to people online or in real life, it feels brave to me because for me this is an enormous mountain to tackle.
I crave close connections but I fear the part between meeting someone and having them be in my trusted tiny inner circle.
I’m working on this one brave choice at a time. 💗

😢 It makes me sad when this happens in life. But it's exhausting to be the only one trying to keep a friendship going. And I'm told we are responsible for our own happiness, so I guess it's time to let go & stop giving where it's not appreciated.... _____________________________
#friendships #letgo #truefriends #findthegoodones #onesided #closethedoor #giveandtake #giving #anotherwillopen #keepthegoodones #noexcuses #selfrespect #brave #SOULSHAKER #twistedangel #love #Godsplan #empath #likemom 💕

My Day 39 on 2/23/18 of #soulshaker class. It IS amazing to eat real food at lunch, instead of energy bars, my newer habit of the past year. I put this bowl together from leftovers I had from last night's dinner. I love lunch time now and this feels like self-respect. I like eating plants all day. I know I'm also respecting the planet 🌎 too. #soulshakerdailyadventure

My Day 39 of #soulshaker today on 2/23/18. I drew these cards and the music one is one I had added to the blank card sets. So OMG! This hits my heart and soul and is so incredibly PERFECT for where I'm at in my journey. I have to say "no" to things like spending too much time on my iPhone and scrolling on social media, so I can say "yes" to my musician's path. I want to dedicate more time to my instruments and learning. Actually, yesterday, I talked to a person who I set up guitar lessons with. I begin on Monday next week. I've been playing 10 years and have self-taught on and off, along with taking lessons at various points. I've been a musician all of my life, but guitar since my 30s. My anxiety and insomnia were over the top recently and I realized it was because I was upset for putting my goals and dreams on the shelf. I had reasoned with myself that once I was done with decluttering and had my whole life in perfect order, I'd reward myself by signing up for guitar lessons again. Ha! Why do I do this to myself? I also have to share something vulnerable. I've been putting getting back into performing on the back burner the past 2.5 years because I was waiting for my hair I lost at my temples to come back more. I feel there's pressure to look "pretty" as a female musician. Such hogwash! 😂 I don't want to share much more about my musician goals, since at times, talking about them not only dilutes them, but it leaves me feeling vulnerable due to my sensitive nature. I sometimes get folks asking me if I want to be a rock star. 😂 Yet, so many men and boys take music lessons and do projects and never get asked that. Some of us just want to create, share, and develop our skills for the joy of it and maybe we inspire others if we're lucky. I don't have a goal of "making it" in music. I just want to live my soul's callings. That's all. #soulshakerintentions

💙🙏🏼🙌🏼 Happy Friday, Folks!! Save your fucks for Magical Shit!! You Are an Important Soul and should devote your energy to something life-giving and magical!! Let that little shit go! Love and Light and Namaste 🙏🏼💙 #lightenupfrancis #workyourmagic #letthatshitgo #loveyourself #divineenergy #eghealingartistry #energyshifter #soulshaker

Today’s @bravecollectivepodcast episode is the first of a 2-part series with the wonderful @melodyross.soulshaker . We joke about it, but the three of us pretty much sat there staring at Melody while she talked about self-respect and what God has done in her life. I hope you’ll listen, friends. It’s balm for your soul. ❤️ #soulshaker #soakitup

This woke me up: In Shambhala it is common to greet each other “Good Morning” regardless of the time of day because it is a reminder that you have the ability to wake up at any moment of your life. It all comes back to me every time I find my way back to the cushion. #risingsun #soulshaker #18myyear2blossom

#Repost @bravecollectivepodcast with @get_repost
Wow! @melodyross.soulshaker came to visit a few weeks ago, and friends, it was a-maz-ing. She dropped so many truth bombs that we may have been rendered speechless throughout most of the podcast. And if you can’t tell from the picture, we had a lot of fun too while we were soaking in all that truth. tomorrow is the day, part 1!! #bravecollectivepodcast #podcast #sistersdoinghardthings #godsbest #braveliving #truthbomb #bravegirlsclub #soulshaker

“Respecting myself while enjoying authenticity.” This morning I woke up and was like… dang… I think maybe I’m posting too much. People are probably annoyed. I was feeling some shameful feelings about this.

Then I thought- you know what? This is me. I love to share the good, the bad, the funny, the meaningful, all of it.
I am a very visual person and taking pictures and adding words to it really helps me process and get things out.
Yes, I know I could do this in a journal or something, but there are two main reasons I post to you all.
1.  I enjoy the connection with people who may experience similar things. I learn from other’s comments and life stories and information.
2.  I want others to know that they can see the bad and know they are not alone. I hope it gives hope once in a while in the feeds of perfection and beauty. We are human. We are all both struggling and succeeding in our own ways. We are not perfect.
So here it is. My authentic self. I feel self-respect when I do what feels right to me and that’s being completely open and sharing.
We are all different and if you choose to share nothing- I respect that. :) If you choose to share everything- I respect that too.
I believe the world needs more authenticity. This is how we will heal. This is how we will form true connection, and trust, and acceptance.
#SoulShaker #43of90

It's my Day 38 on 2/22/18 of #soulshaker class. I thought about it and feel grateful for my simpler life I've created for myself. I don't miss being on my computer (pictured here) all day, working hard to write content, do social media, and market myself. I'm a published author with a large self-help company. My book came out at the end of 2012. I had wanted to get published for 20 years, so it was a big deal for me. I had a lot of disappointment and a situational depression with my book journey. It was due to things like some not making good on their promises, along with the politics that goes with corporations. I also had some who I thought were friends break my heart. I made my book an Amazon best-seller. I'm glad I wrote it, even if it only helped one person. I would write a totally different book today, of course. At the end of 2015, after my mom died at age 63, I closed my online biz as an author, coach, and speaker. I had worked so hard, totally exhausting myself, getting a massive flare up of Epstein-Barr virus and all of my autoimmune stuff. As I write this, I'm so glad this all happened! I got on the path to eating even healthier than I was before, reversing 5 autoimmune conditions. I'm a whole food, plant-based vegan. So many of my family have died of cancer, along with having diabetes, obesity, and heart disease. I was always a health nut, but decided to up my game. I've had a lot of grief and loss to deal with, but as I sit here, I'm the happiest and healthiest I've ever been and I'm 46. I feel I'm reversing aging too. Yay for all the hard earned lessons! #soulshakerdailyadventure 🙏🏻💖🕉💖🙏🏻 #bravegirlsclub

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