111506 posts


What's up party people? It's me, your little perpetually flawed, super neurodivergent friend Ashley. Just checking in to tell you where I'm at in my head and in life these days.
I'm assuming that the majority of people that follow me aren't going to read this, it's just a law of averages thing. Plus, laziness. Double tapping and swiping to the next pic is so much easier than reading. Reading requires actual thought processing and shit. Plus, it's meโ€”so you know shit is probably going to get dark or awkward. I'm raw and uncut these days, it happens.
Tomorrow, I will have 3 months sober. One more sunset and one more sunrise and I will have been clean and sober for exactly 90 days. It's a huge landmark, but one I will wait to celebrate. One day at a time, right kids?
I met with my sponsor this afternoon. We met for coffee at my happy place, i.e. Whole Foods. Today, I officially moved into the "maintenance" phase of the 12-Step program. Technically, I've been working the last three steps since day one, but now I'm officially on (what I'm calling) the teneleventwelve step. I don't really need to say anything more about this because, if you get it you get it. And if you don't, that's okay too.
As far as the whole abnormal brain thing goes, I'm doing ok. Brain meds seem to be working well. Also taking a lot of vitamins. Addicted to coffee and Diet Coke. But that's okay because caffeine has a paradoxical effect of my brain. My meds are notorious for weight gain, so I have an irrational, yet rational fear of getting fat. Body dysmorphia is very high these days.
To be honest, I'm not really sure what to do with this Instagram account anymore. Should I rebrand it and potentially lose a large portion of my followership? Or do I keep it focused on beer, gracefully bow out, and let contributors take it over?
Can I keep your attention if I shift my whole focus to food, coffee and lifestyle photography? Are you only here for the beer? Or will you stick by me through this major life transition? Can I continue to keep it raw and real? I guess, what I'm really asking, is can you like Ashley for Ashley? Without the beer? Without the wench? Your opinion matters! โ€”A

my sobriety has been the topic of a few different discussions lately. it's still something that is so bizarre to me when I think about it.
I'll have moments where I think, ya know, maybe my drinking wasn't that big of a problem. maybe one day I'll be able to have a glass of wine again.
then I'll have these conversations with people about our past, and "partying days" or even just "day to days" and realize that no, I cannot be trusted with alcohol. I am not a good person when I consume alcohol. my body does not process alcohol the way some people's do.
and that's okay! IT'S OKAY NOT TO DRINK!! I try to think of it that same as how some people's bodies don't do well with ice cream (thank the LORT I can still have ice cream ๐Ÿฆ)
we're all different. in every aspect of life. yet, were all completely the same. human connection and realizing we're not alone in this journey is what keeps us going. ๐Ÿ—๐Ÿ—๐Ÿ—
proud of this movement and the warriors who have jumped on board ๐Ÿ‘‰๐Ÿผ๐Ÿ‘‰๐Ÿผ @MENTALKILTER โž•โž•โž•
check out our blog and read some of the testimonies that may relate to you. ๐Ÿ–ค www.mentalkilter.com

Oh hey party people! It's officially officialโ€”I have been sober for exactly 90 days! Hit up two of my favorite meetings today to "celebrate" this awesome milestone with my fave local AA friends. And then, my mom took me to see Beauty & the Beast, which was ABSOLUTELY PHENOMENAL by the way. Like completely blew my mind. Everything was on point. Singing was perfection, the costumes and set were gorgeous, the acting was top notch, and the animation was out of this world. And then, my parents took me an awesome carnivorous dinner at a local brewpub. I made my dad order the Vienna Lager so I could smell it.
Yes, kids. It's okay for me to smell beer. Remember, I was one of those beer tasting "pros" once upon a time. Just cause I gone done and admitted the stuff is poison to my body, don't mean I gone done and lost 10 years of olfactory training. Eyebrow raise, fake hair flip, duck face, finger wag.
It might come as a surprise, considering how early I am in my sobriety, but the craving for alcohol has actually been completely removed from my mind and body. I think a lot of it has to do with being on brain meds. I also haven't been around it virtually at all in the past 3 months, so that helps. Plus, I'm actually kind of happy now. And apparently, happy Ashley has a huge aversion for chemical depressants.
In other news, I've been binge watching RuPaul's Drag Race the past two nights. And, I'm pretty sure it's wearing off on me.... But oddly enough, only from the neck up. The rest of me is in sweats, per usual. And yes, I did go out in public, quite proudly actually, with a full face of makeup, teased the fuck cray cray hair and..... sweats. Because? It's my sobriety birthday and I'll wear Barbie lipstick and sweats if I want to, bitches. Yeah, that's right. I'm giving y'all sassafrasโ€”which is totally my new word for sass. Sassyfras pants over here, y'all better watch out!
Last but not least, MEGA THANKS to my whole villageโ€”my parents, my friends, my doctors, my sponsor, my fellowship friends, ALL OF YOU GUYSโ€”for helping me stay sober each and every one of these past 90 days. This coin is for all of you! Besos! โ€”A

To thine own self be true. Know who you are by listening to your inner voice. And if you follow that voice, you'll be free to choose your own path in life. ...and play this #throwback on iTunes #music #BOSTON #PEACEOFMIND #sober #portland #firstdate #safe #DONTDRINKANDDRIVE #america #live #life #learn #laugh #love and #forgive #onedayatatime #pdx #sobriety #justdoit #pnw #soberlife and #recovery #portlandia #soberliving #newlife northwest alano club

Stop chasing dope and start chasing hope ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†#wedorecover #endthestigma #sobriety #soberliving #recovery #rehab #drugfree #aa #na #motivation #inspiration #inspire #transformation #hope #fit #fitness #me #happy #apparel #addiction #quotes #fashion #fellowship

I have to agree! For the longest time I blamed everyone else for my problems. I believed that because of you I used and drank. Because of my circumstances I had to change my perception and get loaded. That life sucked because of everything else. But now... (thank god) I don't have to participate in your drama and I no longer have to respond to things or people that do not suit me. But what I do have to do is suit up, show up and look at my part. I am still sometimes stubborn till the end but you can believe after working on my recovery I know I have a part. The big girl panty thing again. It will surface then or later. ๐Ÿณ#surrender ๏ธdoingitsober.com #doingitsober #sober #clean #drugfree #truth #addiction #hope #soberliving #hope #soberlife #soberaf #ypr


Tonight I had the privilege of attending the South Carolina Governor's Ball. Here's a photo of me holding up my glass of water like it's a cocktail?...๐Ÿค“๐Ÿค” #soberliving #sc #carolina #columbia #governor #palmetto #ball #fancy #fitness #fitfam #barbellsoverbooze #water #weights #gymgirl #carolinagirl #southernliving #love

Today I had the opportunity to go to a charter school and help do some landscaping. I'm grateful that I was chosen to contribute to the community and be a part of this positive experience. I hope to be a part of more community service crews in the future, and will continue to work on speaking up on crews and around the house.
16 days sober #grateful #soberlife #brothers #community #soberliving #sober

(Link to Danny's story in bio) "We can recover from a hopeless state of mind and body. We don't have to stay sick. We can get well, and show others the same freedom we found." -Recovery Rockstar, Danny #recovery #wedorecover #recoveryisworthit #recoveryispossible #recoveryrockstars #sober #sobriety #soberlife #soberliving #soberaf #soberissexy #positivevibes #positive #selfworth #selflove #hope #strength #inspiration

My granny was as Irish as they come, and she used to make the best potato bread on the planet. This isn't quite it, but it worked out beautifully and was a fun way to spend my day in between cleaning and organizing my house. Scrumptious!

#Irish #irishgirl #potatobread #potato #potatobuns #homemade #homebaked #fluffy #buttery #bakingislife #bakingday #sober #sobriety #soberlife #soberliving #sobergirl #sobermovement #onedayatatime #onemomentatatime #addiction #recovery #strength #foodnotbooze

You are holding back....
You are not engaging in exercise....
You are not eating healthy.....
You are not following that dream of owning your own business......
You still are concerned what others may think of you if you allow yourself time to do what you want...... Do you understand, you are your own problem?
But the good news is, YOU are your own SOLUTION!

You can do all you want to do and more......if you TRULY believe in YOU!

I do....

Nothing comes to a sleeper but a dream you gotta get outchea and just do it...๐Ÿ’ฏ #soberliving #stepbystep @marleydagod

Most Popular Instagram Hashtags