#shizophrenic

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How to never ever find a boy/#boyfriend ever again: be a #confident strong woman who is in peace with her body and aint afraid to show it. Trust me. It scares off 100% of the guys. (Exept the gross pervs who send me dick pics). It's such a #shizophrenic society we live in, it's starting to frustrate/ upset me a lot. We are surrounded by hot pictures of girls everyday, its super normal and you guys/girls enjoy it. But as soon as i do it as a "real"person, it's not so okay anymore? I have to listen to things like "omg what does your bf think about this" or "woah don't you have any respect for yourself" or" i wouldnt want my girl to post pics like this online". Thats so two sided! You look at hot girls online and its super fine, but your girlfriend is not allowed to do so? Since a year i have learned to accept my body 100% for the first time ever, i feel beautiful despite my little imperfections, and i enjoy to share this with the world and even hope to inspire a little bit. So it upsets me a lot that this seems to be a super no-go for boys, boys seem to be scared off, intimidated or idk what, please tell me ?!

All the colours of the rainbow. #monochromatic #shizophrenic

عَز خودَمـ مُتِنَفِرَمـ :)) #شیزوفرنی
#shizophrenic

Talking to my self
#shizophrenic state of mind.

MOST RECENT

“sometimes i don’t know what the fuck is wrong with me. i mean i know there’s a bunch of letters that scramble together to make a diagnosis and that it’s tattooed on my body somewhere in ugly font but sometimes i just feel like i’m experiencing life from the outside of an old photograph, taking pictures of moments that mean nothing even though they should be beautiful to me. i feel like i’m a passenger in a ship but also the captain, like i have to watch it crash and stay on it.
what i’m saying here is i’m sorry sometimes i’m not really there. i’m sorry and i love you but sometimes i take off of this planet and forget how to get back inside of me. like i’m operating only on the basic instructions. i’m sorry i break down easily it’s just that i feel nothing and then suddenly i feel everything or maybe i still feel nothing it’s just that i can’t figure out what exactly is the reason i’m crying.
that’s what i mean. that i know but i don’t know what’s wrong with me. i know why i don’t clean my room or get up and organize my work or tell her i can see her on her birthday. but i don’t know why i haven’t pulled out the stitches from my tongue and told him that i am so sad i’m splitting from it. or why i cry during commercials where the families are all happy. or why outside it’s warm and sticky and i want to be struck by lightning. i mean i am boiling, but it’s like watching a pot go over on the t.v. like nothing is happening to me. what i’m saying is that there’s a difference between knowing you’ve got an excuse and finding yourself sleeping for a little over four hours a night. what i’m saying is i’m sorry. i’m not alright.”
—(via inkskinned.tumblr.com)

and if youre broken, you dont have to stay broken. you dont have to lay in bed all day and think about the thing that broke you. you can get up, take a shower, put on new clothes, and start over. you can go out on an adventure all by yourself starting in the rosy light of dawn when the sun isnt quite awake yet. and you can go to the beach or the forest and be alone and remember how whole you are despite how broken you feel. you are here, and to make it this far, you must've been broken, im sure, but to be broken makes us stronger. it doesnt wear us thin unless we let it. being broken gives us the experience to travel on to new places and new people and get over the things that made us never want to feel again. so if youre broken, stay out until dusk and watch the stars when they creep out, speak to them, and theyll let you know that you are not alone. go home and climb into bed and this time, do not cry or pity yourself. make yourself warm and cozy and rest yourself so that tomorrow you may wake up and have an adventure again. keep going on adventures as long as you need to patch yourself up and dust yourself up. / dont stay broken. (cc: @eart.htastic)

"Stop questioning. Stop overthinking. Stop looking back and trying to measure where you’ve been or how far you have left to go. Stop telling yourself you aren’t there yet, or aren’t good enough.
Stop.
Because right where you are in this moment—even in all this imperfection and mess and steps still left to take—is exactly where you’re supposed to be.
Thousands of moments led up to this. Hundreds of decisions and actions. Millions of tiny thoughts and mistakes and blessings have brought you are. And here is good.
For some reason we keep telling ourselves that we aren’t worthy, that we have so far to go, that we’ll never reach this standard we hold ourselves to. But we forget that every step of the journey is part of the journey. We forget that there are going to be rough patches on the road to success, that there will be downs to each of our ups, and that sometimes we’re not going to be moving at all, but instead standing still. And all of these places are okay.
Because where we are in every moment is where we’re supposed to be.
We’re supposed to be tired. We’re supposed to be defeated. We’re supposed to be stuck. We’re supposed to be stagnant. It means we are learning.
We have to stop telling ourselves that we are failing. We have to stop telling ourselves that we won’t make it because we haven’t yet. We have to stop telling ourselves that we are losing. Because there’s nothing to lose.
We are only gaining—knowledge, wisdom, experience, lessons. Everything we go through teaches us how to survive. Every obstacle helps us learn who we are. Every painful moment breaks us, but builds us. And little by little, we are making it through.
So stop. Stop worrying. Stop wondering. Stop letting yourself feel defeated and broken. You are none of those things. You are a person who is growing, changing, learning, becoming, succeeding. And where you are right now? That’s exactly where you’re supposed to be. Trust in the moment, and more importantly, trust yourself. You are incredible and strong."
—@_marisadonnelly

Tell me about your dreams we can make them Memories ~ here you go with another Shizodoll picture from last july :) picture shot by @benito_photography
#Shizodoll #Shizo #Doll #shizophrenic #mind #Lordi #hella #mrlordi #Cosplay #Kawaii #splitdye #greenhair #brownhair #lolita #gothiclolita #anime #Manga #creepy #spooki #cute #halfandhalf #sad #deprimised #cosplayphoto #cosplayphotography

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