It has already been a few weeks since Shawn broke up with me. I haven't heard of him since then, he didn't try to contact me, not a single time. The last thing I remember is that agonizing look on his face and the tears in his eyes. And that is what still keeps me from hating Shawn. Because I know those hazel eyes really damn well and they weren't cold, they were full of love and pain. I wanna know why he broke up. I know it's more then just the fact that 'It doesn't work'. I'm not dumb and after crying my eyes out for one week I realized that it has to be more. What Shawn and I had, that was something real and pure. I know that for sure. We loved each other and I can't say that for him but I know that I still love him.
Things kinda went back to normal the last weeks, besides the constant hurting of my heart. My daily routine is pretty much the same like before I visited him. I go to school, come home, study, eat and sleep. I try to keep me as busy as possible so I don't have to think about Shawn all the time. But when it's getting late and I'm laying in my bed, alone, without a goodnight message from him, then my thoughts are free and go wherever they want. And somehow I always end up crying myself to sleep.
Today is Saturday and Beth and I, well actually just Beth because she's trying to distract me, decided to look after some prom dresses. Even though Shawn will not come I still don't want to miss my own prom. I love dresses and I love shopping so I'm really excited to go. Beth picks me up and then we drive to the city. She already got her dress a while ago so we're just searching one for me. I try on tons of dresses in thousand different shops but either they don't fit, look ugly or I don't feel good in them. We're about to give up when we spot that tiny shop in a side street, just selling a few clothes.
"Let's give it a try" Beth shrugs and we head into it.
I look through the dresses and then I finally spot it. It's like love at first sight and I know: this one is it. I take the dress from the clothes rail and go into the wardrobe to try it on.
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