>> TRANSFORMATION/TRANSPARENT TUESDAY << My postpartum journey has been hard. During my pregnancy I gained 60 lbs and had horrible, excruciatingly painful sciatica. Baby boy Remy came in the beginning of September and when he was about 4 weeks old I went to my doctor and we came to the conclusion that I had postpartum depression. I also had horrible pain with breastfeeding and Remy was losing too much weight. We started supplementing with formula and by 6 weeks old he was completely on formula - this was a really hard reality for me to wrap my head around.
On top of it all, Seattle had the longest, darkest, rainiest winters ever. So, during an already depressing season for a normal human I was dealing with PPD, an extra 60 lbs, sleep deprivation, bleeding nipples (sorry, I know that's TMI), sciatica and a 2 1/2 year old Harper.
I gave myself some time to grieve breastfeeding my last baby. I had a very similar experience with Harper (my now 3 1/2 year old) and had high hopes for things to be different with Remy. With the help of my husband (really he carried me through this season, sometimes literally) I decided to focus on the positive in this hard season. Because I wasn't breastfeeding I hit it hard in the gym and celebrated often with wine and whiskey 😋
Isn't it amazing what our bodies are capable of? I remember taking this before photo and thinking "eeew how am I ever going to get to where I want to be" but damnit look at the progress I've made. I'm proud of where I am and thankful for where I've been. It's not about perfection. It's about balance and continuing to move forward even when we make mistakes. ESPECIALLY when we make mistakes! Keep going! Shoutout to the community of women, my fit fam, who have kept me accountable to my goals and pushed me when I couldn't push myself. ✌🏻