🙋♀️ Hey everyone. Sorry for the inactivity on this account lately. A lot has been on my mind.
In short, my self-esteem has been abysmal. I don't like what I see in the mirror these days. My social life is borderline non-existent and my social anxiety is through the roof.
Browsing Instagram does very little for me anymore. Mainly what I see are complex suspensions, gorgeous slender models and perfect "pretty" rope. I'm not saying those are bad things, but what I am saying is that more and more I feel like I don't have a place here (Insta, kink/rope community, Melbourne, etc.) anymore.
Of course, I'm very aware that this most likely all in my head. But at the end of the day, I'm still unhappy. I'm working on making some major changes in my life and hopefully by next year I will find myself in a fresh environment where I can learn, be curious, be myself and learn to live again.
To all my followers, I'd like to say a huge thank you for the support. I'm not a perfect, acrobatic, elegant model... I never will be and I doubt I'll ever want to be. All I know is how to lose myself in rope; to be vulnerable, raw and unrefined. Rope is my place to be NOT perfect. I'm guessing that some of you have noticed this and decided to click "Follow" because of it. I just need to remember that I do actually have something to offer.
Pre-rope shot taken at Studio SIX, Tokyo earlier this year.