If you know me, or have followed me through the start of a New Year, you may remember that for many years now I have chosen to take a word into the coming year rather than a resolution.
I've never been big on New Years Resolutions...in fact I'm not sure that I've ever even set one...it always seemed a bit silly to wait until the page of a calendar flipped to set a goal, especially when you make them so lofty you are just setting yourself up to fail. However for the past 8 or 9 years I have chosen a word for the New Year. This word represents how I want to live & what I want to experience and intentionally focus more on in the next 365 days. I've been trying out different words for the past few days-literally saying random words out loud while driving, in the shower, sitting and watching tv-and today finally felt like I found the one that feels right, so my word for 2018 is ANYWAY.
In many ways the word anyway is connected to having a choice. Knowing that I have the ultimate ability to choose something, even if it’s just my response to a situation, is incredibly important to my heart. It’s also incredibly powerful to my ultimate feeling of wellbeing and safety in this world.
So in 2018-
When I am terrified, when all I want to do is turn around and run away instead of facing my feelings-I will keep my feet planted ANYWAY.
When my voice shakes and being silent feels easier and like less of a risk-I will speak ANYWAY.
When I get tired of eating and it feels like a chore that never goes away-I will pick up the fork ANYWAY.
When my heart gets broken, as tender hearts do-I will continue loving ANYWAY.
When I spend time with those most precious to me, I’ll be fully present with them and less focused on the perfect picture-Friends and family are more important than impressing anonymous followers ANYWAY.
When I don’t do life, recovery, or relationships perfectly, I will give myself grace as best I know how-Nobody likes perfect people ANYWAY.
And in the fleeting moments that will sneak up on me in the coming year, in the moments of doubt when I distrust that I have what it takes to keep fighting-I will remind myself that for 34 years-I’ve done it ANYWAY.