Happy Birthday, Earthday to Me👑 ... While I can reflect on the fact that I have made it. My children are healthy and happy, I myself am still battling with the death of my King "Daddy". I have done everything to reject those closest to me, I realise that I am grieving and over analysing everything.
I want out!
But as I ask myself "out from what" I have no clue.
My job is very stressful, so I give an actress appearance when working on cases as vulnerability, while working with the vulnerable is obviously not an option.
I feel alone, I feel emotional, I feel confused, I feel angry, I am only human.
I have pushed my Mr away 100 times, but he refuses to leave my side. Like a raging bull he stands defiant in not leaving his family.
But today as I lay here thinking about the man who loved me unconditionally, I hear him saying "Daught's, Jen, Sham, Shaq, Shak ... Whats your name again" 😆😩 (confused momentarily with a jumble of his daughters-granddaughter's names) then he would shout! "Shakira your my oldest daughter, you have to be strong, you have to keep your little sisters together, you got to pull yourself together, they are relying on you, Al loves you, I love Al, your a spoilt b*+!h, I built strong daughters, but you got to stop being so hard, now go enjoy your birthday, you know I f#*%ing would Lol." Daddy I miss you😩, the divine in me honours the divine in you💞 Namaste, until our souls meet again💖💋