Breaking News: Empty chip bags proof of Potsquatch
Coe Hill residents are waking up to empty chip bags and a distinctly skunky smell on this hazy 420 morning. “Let me be blunt,” said area resident Barb Shaw, “I left out a big-ass bag of chips, the Costco ones, and now there’s just a few crumbs left.” Shaw says her fridge was also left open, and someone drew dicks on the chalkboard in the kitchen. “If you refer to the evidence,” Shaw says, pointing at the dick pics, “The Potsquatch was totally here. I mean, who else would draw dicks in my kitchen?” Each year the towering marijuana creature lumbers out of the woods for one day of chronic celebration, beginning with a house to house quest for chips. “There’s resin everywhere,” Shaw laughed.
Fully fueled with salty goodness, the Potsquatch is rumored to join area residents for wake and bake activities in the Hamlet. “I’m going to play some Phish records and hope he comes back for some pancakes,” Shaw said.
Photo credit: Area trail cam.
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