It's been hours since I am under this shower,the blood oozing out from my forehead is dripping down,merging with that water,it is marking my body,like a map,a map that leads to nowhere.My soul is swimming and diving into these blood droplets but there are these stones tied to my legs and I am drowning,I am dying,I cant breath and it's only you who could save me but then I see you there lying in that bloody bathtub and I think it would take me a million lifetimes to get back to feel anything at all other than death,death and death.
Remember Hannah,once upon a time,when we both felt alive;Do you remember those nights?
We were wrapped in the essence of those carmel popcorns when I asked you to accompany me to the rooftop.It was a dark midnight but all I remember is how your eyes smiled,lips curved and you did a slight firm nod and then; then i held your hands,my fingers wrapping firmly around your tender unfrozen pulse and unscarred veins,around your tender wrist,I held you,as if holding onto my last piece of life. You intertwined your fingers with mine;I still feel that touch,as if these cracks and crevices in me would be complete by fitting your touch right there in those dark corners of my soul,step by step, breath by breath;you gripped me harder,we sat warmly on that cold terrace;under the gaze of those million stars;none of them as beautiful as you,your eyes had a weird shine while watching those stars,as if you knew that you belonged with them,as if you were some precious celestial life caged up in a pained human body,but then you were chuckling, chuckling through the cold leaving those puffs of fog out of your crumbled lips,your nose was red from the cold and your white gentle skin was glowing as the moonlight drew patterns on your skin.You stumbled a bit but I had you gripped in my arms,I was not letting go Hannah,not then,not ever &you;you held me too chuckling the most beautiful rhythm in the world. "Woah easy there Hannah,what if we would have fallen down" "Then.." you said while grinning "we would have died"
There was this pain in your laughter when the word "death" left from your innocent lips but then your eyes were soft,(comment)