I feel like giving up on life. I'm exhausted from clinicals, I'm miserable, and I don't know what to do. I was hoping someone would have made a comment on my last post, but no one did. It was something really important to me and I feel as if no one really cares about how I feel. I'm just amongst a sea of faces, I guess.
There's times when I wish I knew how to use a gun so I could shoot myself in the head. I keep wanting to end my life because nothing I do makes me feel happy. I may seem like I would have friends in real life, but I don't. No one wants to connect with me. No one wants to get to know me or hang out with me. People look at me like I'm some kind of freak and push me away. I've always been the "weird kid" that no one wanted to play with. I've always been "different," and I still don't know how to deal with it. Sure, I want to feel empowered by being different than other people, but my insecurities trump all good things I see in myself.
I want to be loved, I want to be beautiful inside and out, and I want people to see me as something different in a good way. I want to express myself openly and forget all the rules. I want to actually be MYSELF, not this fake normal bullshit that I show to everyone. I'm not an animal, and I don't need to be caged.
If you're reading this, PLEASE SAY SOMETHING. I'm having a hard time with life right now and any sort of discussion about this will help more than you think. Please help me.... #help #suicidal #aspergers #autism #aspergerssyndrome #asd #neurotypical #helpmenow #struggle #struggles #selfexpresion #lgbt #bisexual #longhairdontcare #crazy #awkward #awkwardaf #pleasedontignorethis #ineedyourhelp #dmmeplease