#paynehawthorne

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TOP POSTS

#paynehawthorne #allmadeup #greeneyes #redhead
Sometimes I look good, sometimes, not so much. Haha.

Payne Hawthorne Author of paranormal romance fiction
Author of Memoir, Poetry, Prose & short quotes
Seeker of life lessons & Soul-evolution/improvement
Emotional empath always seeking lost soul-mates.
Forever looking for love and eradicating shame.
Horse development specialist/horse 'whisperer'/prey-animal psychologist
Find me on Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, Goodreads, G+, and all my books in print/digital/audio formats on Amazon. -
- www.paynehawthorne.com
-
#poetry #writer #empath #empathy #paynehawthorne  #emotionalintelligence #author #quotes #soulsearching #soulmates #lovequotes #lovestory #love #brokenheart #wordsofwisdom #inspirationalquotes #thoughts #behindmymirror #womanofworth
#yourquote #quoteoftheday #wordporn #quotestagram #wordswag  #writeaway #instawriters #writersofinstagram #narcissisticabuse #recoveryfromanarcissist #narcissticabuseawareness

It was a good hair day. Night. ♡ #paynehawthorne #goodnight #redhead #goodhairday

Just another day at the barn. #nomakeup #paynehawthorne

Feeding time in my koi pond.
#koifish #koi #pond #backyardpond
#paynehawthorne

@anotherperspectiveonlife #regram
I love this because it's truth.
#paynehawthorne

My quest for a King has brought me to an asylum full of the infirmed and disordered.
Predators and prey, cannibals and vampires.
Delusional and quixotic, the lot of them.
The putrefied and juvenile, and the inconsistent shifters.
The aggressive and feeble, the narcissists and dull empaths.
Liars, decenters, inflictors, users, abusers, and addicts.
The mean and merciless; the killers of soul and spirit.
The catatonic screams of the lost, echo and shiver.
They are all, dysfunctional and unevolved.
They are the dead and un-dead, the killers and the victims.
Sadists and deviants who smell of death and seamen.
They are unbalanced and deranged.
A paradox of extremes.
A dichotomy of dissipations and excesses.
They are decaying infants, lost inside their animal brains.
They are either orthodox militants or apathetic failures.
They are faithless radicals; egocentric, promiscuous cult leaders, fucking with Kool-aide as a lubricant and false rhetoric as an excuse.
The beautiful outsides are disguises for the demon possessed.
The ugly are emotional retards.
They are brilliant idiots.
Paranoid and judgmental. Preaching hypocrites.
The therapy is useless.
The councilors are corrupt inmates.
I’m hiding in the middle of this shit storm of the insane.
This Eden was once thriving, but the parasites ate all the color.
I have no hope.
Release or recovery?
That’s hilarious.
My King doesn’t even know I’m here." Trapped in an Asylum
Poetry Collection -
- www.paynehawthorne.com
-
#prose #poetry #writer #paynehawthorne #empath #empathy #narcissist  #emotionalintelligence #author #poetess #poet #quotes #soulsearching #soulmates #brokenheart #brokensoul #wordsareart #trappedinanasylum

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Payne Hawthorne Author of paranormal romance fiction
Author of Memoir, Poetry, Prose & short quotes
Seeker of life lessons & Soul-evolution/improvement
Emotional empath always seeking lost soul-mates.
Forever looking for love and eradicating shame.
Horse development specialist/horse 'whisperer'/prey-animal psychologist
Find me on Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, Goodreads, G+, and all my books in print/digital/audio formats on Amazon. -
- www.paynehawthorne.com
-
#poetry #writer #empath #empathy #paynehawthorne  #emotionalintelligence #author #quotes #soulsearching #soulmates #lovequotes #lovestory #love #brokenheart #wordsofwisdom #inspirationalquotes #thoughts #behindmymirror #womanofworth
#yourquote #quoteoftheday #wordporn #quotestagram #wordswag  #writeaway #instawriters #writersofinstagram #narcissisticabuse #recoveryfromanarcissist #narcissticabuseawareness

--
"I’m understanding, better
These shit storms of emotions as they crest over my head
I’m comprehending the damage wrought
His toxic, shame-based outlook and how it overflowed
Like a tsunami of judgements, gauntlets, verdicts and executions
The toil of a childhood wrongly implemented
And the continual reproach heaped on his head
The overflow is a hazardous mess
And I dove right in, thinking I possessed immunity
My emotional intelligence was at an epic, literate level
Of course, I can handle his need for validation
I used to feel love, and untold variety of emotions
It created a canvas of healthy memories I could draw from
I healed myself, numerous times, and my focus was fixed
I knew the discipline it takes to recover, and I was overflowing
My reserves were full, and he knew it.
His inner contempt, fed on the destruction of others,
Just like had been done to him, when he was weaker, and younger.
I was a juicy catch, and he drained me dry almost instantly.
Requiring I return, so I could feed on myself.
I thought my own self-aware light, would obliterate his odium
Instead, he created in me, so much pain
I became it.
Raw in the Middle
Poetry Collection
-
Payne Hawthorne Author of paranormal romance fiction
Author of Memoir, Poetry, Prose & short quotes
Seeker of life lessons & Soul-evolution/improvement
Emotional empath always seeking lost soul-mates.
Forever looking for love and eradicating shame.
Horse development specialist/horse 'whisperer'/prey-animal psychologist
Find me on Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, Goodreads, G+, and all my books in print/digital/audio formats on Amazon. -
- www.paynehawthorne.com
-
#poetry #writer #empath #empathy #paynehawthorne  #emotionalintelligence #author #quotes #soulsearching #soulmates #lovequotes #lovestory #love #brokenheart #wordsofwisdom #inspirationalquotes #thoughts #behindmymirror #womanofworth
#yourquote #quoteoftheday #wordporn #quotestagram #wordswag #narcissisticabuse #recoveryfromanarcissist #writersofinstagram

"All I can do is write it out
Lance that boil, and drain the puss
It’s a deep wound and refuses to heal
Verses and sonnets are the antibodies and death eating antidote
Like little maggots, worming out the infection
One word at a time,
Strung together as patches and bandages
Over a heart full of fissures
My only power to heal is through
Poetry and prose
Spill my sorrow and emotional ailments
In stanza and cadence, tempo and rhythm
My tumultuous soul will find restoration and balance
Raw in the Middle
Poetry Collection"
-
Payne Hawthorne Author of paranormal romance fiction
Author of Memoir, Poetry, Prose & short quotes
Seeker of life lessons & Soul-evolution/improvement
Emotional empath always seeking lost soul-mates.
Forever looking for love and eradicating shame.
Horse development specialist/horse 'whisperer'/prey-animal psychologist
Find me on Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, Goodreads, G+, and all my books in print/digital/audio formats on Amazon. -
- www.paynehawthorne.com
-
#poetry #writer #empath #empathy #paynehawthorne  #emotionalintelligence #author #quotes #soulsearching #soulmates #lovequotes #lovestory #love #brokenheart #wordsofwisdom #inspirationalquotes #thoughts #behindmymirror #womanofworth
#yourquote #quoteoftheday #wordporn #quotestagram #wordswag  #writeaway #instawriters #writersofinstagram #writersofig #narcissist #rawinthemiddle

"I remember how your scent awakened
And the sight of you aroused
When you touched me, my insides turned to warm honey
You took me to another level of existence
One I’d only dreamt possible
You left me wet, and wanting
My thighs sweet with need and my heart aching, my body craving
I came to life just being in the same room
And my soul flew from the borrowed wings
I’d never felt any of this In all my years of knowing it was you,
I was waiting for.
Raw in the Middle
Poetry Collection
-
Payne Hawthorne Author of paranormal romance fiction
Author of Memoir, Poetry, Prose & short quotes
Seeker of life lessons & Soul-evolution/improvement
Emotional empath always seeking lost soul-mates.
Forever looking for love and eradicating shame.
Horse development specialist/horse 'whisperer'/prey-animal psychologist
Find me on Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, Goodreads, G+, and all my books in print/digital/audio formats on Amazon. -
- www.paynehawthorne.com
-
#poetry #writer #empath #empathy #paynehawthorne  #emotionalintelligence #author #quotes #soulsearching #soulmates #lovequotes #lovestory #love #brokenheart #wordsofwisdom #inspirationalquotes #thoughts #behindmymirror #womanofworth
#yourquote #quoteoftheday #wordporn #quotestagram #wordswag  #writeaway #instawriters #writersofinstagram #writersofig #igwriters #igwritersclub

Payne Hawthorne Author of paranormal romance fiction
Author of Memoir, Poetry, Prose & short quotes
Seeker of life lessons & Soul-evolution/improvement
Emotional empath always seeking lost soul-mates.
Forever looking for love and eradicating shame.
Horse development specialist/horse 'whisperer'/prey-animal psychologist
Find me on Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, Goodreads, G+, and all my books in print/digital/audio formats on Amazon. -
- www.paynehawthorne.com
-
#poetry #writer #empath #empathy #paynehawthorne  #emotionalintelligence #author #quotes #soulsearching #soulmates #lovequotes #lovestory #love #brokenheart #wordsofwisdom #inspirationalquotes #thoughts #behindmymirror #womanofworth
#yourquote #quoteoftheday #wordporn #quotestagram #wordswag  #writeaway #instawriters #beautiful #50yearsyoung

"I want all of my focus to go towards, who I love, how much I love and how deeply I can pull from my love reserves. I want to stretch and build my love-muscle until its immense. I understand, with this as my focus, it means sometimes that muscle has to rip and tear to increase mass."
-
Payne Hawthorne Author of paranormal romance fiction
Author of Memoir, Poetry, Prose & short quotes
Seeker of life lessons & Soul-evolution/improvement
Emotional empath always seeking lost soul-mates.
Forever looking for love and eradicating shame.
Horse development specialist/horse 'whisperer'/prey-animal psychologist
Find me on Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, Goodreads, G+, and all my books in print/digital/audio formats on Amazon. -
- www.paynehawthorne.com
-
#poetry #writer #empath #empathy #paynehawthorne  #emotionalintelligence #author #quotes #soulsearching #soulmates #lovequotes #lovestory #love #brokenheart #wordsofwisdom #inspirationalquotes #thoughts #behindmymirror #womanofworth
#yourquote #quoteoftheday #wordporn #quotestagram #wordswag  #writeaway #instawriters #writersofinstagram #writersofig #igwriters #igwritersclub

"Beauty feeds and fuels, and is a gift
To be attractive is a blessing
It’s one of my contributions
Not the only, but something I possess, sometimes
To be so, I must be loved
It’s better to be from another, but essential from myself
It’s a rare offering, lost on most
Not the fabricated façade
Not to be confused with the vain and vapid
It’s a sharing of loveliness that hydrates in an ugly world
It’s a donation of attention, to detail
It’s a contribution to the starving
It’s recognition of self
It’s a form of submission
It's an inner reflection
It’s not a competition,
We all win if more were…"
-
Payne Hawthorne Author of paranormal romance fiction
Author of Memoir, Poetry, Prose & short quotes
Seeker of life lessons & Soul-evolution/improvement
Emotional empath always seeking lost soul-mates.
Forever looking for love and eradicating shame.
Horse development specialist/horse 'whisperer'/prey-animal psychologist
Find me on Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, Goodreads, G+, and all my books in print/digital/audio formats on Amazon. -
- www.paynehawthorne.com
-
#prose #poetry #writer #personal #empath #empathy #paynehawthorne #emotionalintelligence #author #poetess #poet #quotes #soulsearching #soulmates #lovequotes #lovestory #love #brokenheart  #brokensoul #wordsareart #romance #stories #quoteoftheday #wordporn #wordswag #wordsofwisdom #inspirationalquotes #thoughts #behindmymirror #womanofworth

Payne Hawthorne Author of paranormal romance fiction
Author of Memoir, Poetry, Prose & short quotes
Seeker of life lessons & Soul-evolution/improvement
Emotional empath always seeking lost soul-mates.
Forever looking for love and eradicating shame.
Horse development specialist/horse 'whisperer'/prey-animal psychologist
Find me on Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, Goodreads, G+, and all my books in print/digital/audio formats on Amazon. -
- www.paynehawthorne.com
-
#poetry #writer #empath #empathy #paynehawthorne #emotionalintelligence #author #quotes #soulsearching #soulmates #lovequotes #lovestory #love #brokenheart #wordsofwisdom #inspirationalquotes #thoughts #behindmymirror #womanofworth
#yourquote #quoteoftheday #wordporn #quotestagram #wordswag #writeaway #instawriters #writersofinstagram #writersofig #igwriters #igwritersclub

"I wish my words were happy
I detest being so sad
But I am, and I’m not a liar either
I wish I were buoyant
I hate it that I struggle, ever sinking
But I’m not a liar, so I say
I wish I could access desire
I’m lackluster at best, dead at worst
But I’m not a liar, so here I am
I wish my light were bright
I’ve huddled around my last ember
But, if everyone else lies, so will I"
-
Behind My Mirror
Poetry Collection -
Payne Hawthorne Author of paranormal romance fiction
Author of Memoir, Poetry, Prose & short quotes
Seeker of life lessons & Soul-evolution/improvement
Emotional empath always seeking lost soul-mates.
Forever looking for love and eradicating shame.
Horse development specialist/horse 'whisperer'/prey-animal psychologist
Find me on Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, Goodreads, G+, and all my books in print/digital/audio formats on Amazon. -
- www.paynehawthorne.com
-
#prose #poetry #writer #paynehawthorne #empath #empathy #narcissist  #emotionalintelligence #author #poetess #poet #quotes #soulsearching #soulmates #lovequotes #lovestory #love #brokenheart  #brokensoul #wordsareart #romance #stories #quoteoftheday #wordporn #wordswag #wordsofwisdom #inspirationalquotes #thoughts #behindmymirror #womanofworth

I can’t find you
I seek, quest, pursue an illusion
Swimming across the universe
Out of breath in my ocean of tears
Are you invisible, or just transparent, standing behind your demons?
Were you ever real?
Am I full of fantasy and delusion?
Did I fabricate you from the stars?
I question my reality and doubt this hunger
For a man who never lived
A soul created from pages of a heart
A cabinet of rooms now empty
I wander these lonely halls
Trailing my spirit across a memory
Believing the lies as gospel"
-
Behind My Mirror
Poetry Collection -
Payne Hawthorne Author of paranormal romance fiction
Author of Memoir, Poetry, Prose & short quotes
Seeker of life lessons & Soul-evolution/improvement
Emotional empath always seeking lost soul-mates.
Forever looking for love and eradicating shame.
Horse development specialist/horse 'whisperer'/prey-animal psychologist
Find me on Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, Goodreads, G+, and all my books in print/digital/audio formats on Amazon. -
- www.paynehawthorne.com
-
#prose #poetry #writer #paynehawthorne #empath #empathy #narcissist  #emotionalintelligence #author #poetess #poet #quotes #soulsearching #soulmates #lovequotes #lovestory #love #brokenheart  #brokensoul #wordsareart #romance #stories #quoteoftheday #wordporn #wordswag #wordsofwisdom #inspirationalquotes #thoughts #behindmymirror #womanofworth

My quest for a King has brought me to an asylum full of the infirmed and disordered.
Predators and prey, cannibals and vampires.
Delusional and quixotic, the lot of them.
The putrefied and juvenile, and the inconsistent shifters.
The aggressive and feeble, the narcissists and dull empaths.
Liars, decenters, inflictors, users, abusers, and addicts.
The mean and merciless; the killers of soul and spirit.
The catatonic screams of the lost, echo and shiver.
They are all, dysfunctional and unevolved.
They are the dead and un-dead, the killers and the victims.
Sadists and deviants who smell of death and seamen.
They are unbalanced and deranged.
A paradox of extremes.
A dichotomy of dissipations and excesses.
They are decaying infants, lost inside their animal brains.
They are either orthodox militants or apathetic failures.
They are faithless radicals; egocentric, promiscuous cult leaders, fucking with Kool-aide as a lubricant and false rhetoric as an excuse.
The beautiful outsides are disguises for the demon possessed.
The ugly are emotional retards.
They are brilliant idiots.
Paranoid and judgmental. Preaching hypocrites.
The therapy is useless.
The councilors are corrupt inmates.
I’m hiding in the middle of this shit storm of the insane.
This Eden was once thriving, but the parasites ate all the color.
I have no hope.
Release or recovery?
That’s hilarious.
My King doesn’t even know I’m here." Trapped in an Asylum
Poetry Collection -
- www.paynehawthorne.com
-
#prose #poetry #writer #paynehawthorne #empath #empathy #narcissist  #emotionalintelligence #author #poetess #poet #quotes #soulsearching #soulmates #brokenheart #brokensoul #wordsareart #trappedinanasylum

"It's so fucking simple! I didn't say it was easy, I just said it was simple. What you focus on, is who you become."
-
Payne Hawthorne Author of paranormal romance fiction
Author of Memoir, Poetry, Prose & short quotes
Seeker of life lessons & Soul-evolution/improvement
Emotional empath always seeking lost soul-mates.
Forever looking for love and eradicating shame.
Horse development specialist/horse 'whisperer'/prey-animal psychologist
Find me on Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, Goodreads, G+, and all my books in print/digital/audio formats on Amazon. -
- www.paynehawthorne.com
-
#prose #poetry #writer #paynehawthorne #empath #empathy #narcissist  #emotionalintelligence #author #poetess #poet #quotes #soulsearching #soulmates #lovequotes #lovestory #love #brokenheart  #brokensoul #wordsareart #romance #stories #quoteoftheday #wordporn #wordswag #wordsofwisdom #inspirationalquotes #thoughts #behindmymirror #womanofworth

"I wish I could find him, the real him, the hidden, him
the soul buried behind his wall of ego
I met him once, a long time ago
before the filters and barricades
before the gauntlets and rules
before the demons reigned yet again and ruled his darkness
I loved him, he was a shining star, a hidden treasure, the man I'd been waiting, searching, praying for
His soul was oceanic, and yes, nautically tumultuous
He was as gaunt as I, from the lack of heart food
I wish he'd have let me stay, and he'd have stayed
I would have fed him from my well of reserves, and given him my heart
I miss him
I wish I could find him, again"
-
Payne Hawthorne Author of paranormal romance fiction
Author of Memoir, Poetry, Prose & short quotes
Seeker of life lessons & Soul-evolution/improvement
Emotional empath always seeking lost soul-mates.
Forever looking for love and eradicating shame.
Horse development specialist/horse 'whisperer'/prey-animal psychologist
Find me on Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, Goodreads, G+, and all my books in print/digital/audio formats on Amazon. -
- www.paynehawthorne.com
-
#prose #poetry #writer #paynehawthorne #empath #empathy #narcissist  #emotionalintelligence #author #poetess #poet #quotes #soulsearching #soulmates #lovequotes #lovestory #love #brokenheart  #brokensoul #wordsareart #romance #stories #quoteoftheday #wordporn #wordswag #wordsofwisdom #inspirationalquotes #thoughts #behindmymirror #womanofworth

I try and write, but sometimes I’m too broken
Too tired, too apathetic to care.
The endeavor of extraction is too difficult
Emotions simmer, but words are few
Descriptions of inner turmoil easier than
Depictions of joyous rapture
Not that, that happens much anymore
More words for hate, than love
I appear strong, and certain
I am anything but
I’ve fallen into a mess of parts
Trampled over and rummaged through
What was once meticulous anarchy
Is now just chaotic desolation
The strong rule and conquer
The weak just serve
Left to fend, without sustenance
A weary heart abandons hope"
-
Payne Hawthorne Author of paranormal romance fiction
Author of Memoir, Poetry, Prose & short quotes
Seeker of life lessons & Soul-evolution/improvement
Emotional empath always seeking lost soul-mates.
Forever looking for love and eradicating shame.
Horse development specialist/horse 'whisperer'/prey-animal psychologist
Find me on Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, Goodreads, G+, and all my books in print/digital/audio formats on Amazon. -
- www.paynehawthorne.com
-
#prose #poetry #writer #paynehawthorne #empath #empathy #narcissist  #emotionalintelligence #author #poetess #poet #quotes #soulsearching #soulmates #lovequotes #lovestory #love #brokenheart  #brokensoul #wordsareart #romance #stories #quoteoftheday #wordporn #wordswag #wordsofwisdom #inspirationalquotes #thoughts #behindmymirror #womanofworth

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