Depression is a battle in its own, but, the battle is even tougher as a mother. Mom guilt piled on top of all the other thoughts roaming around my head leaves me feeling more hopeless. There’s guilt and sadness because I feel as though I’m not being a good and fun enough mom for my energetic toddler. I feel crippled, I’m irritable, and lethargic. I let responsibilities slide. Housework and general hygiene is compromised as I slip into bed at night. I pull back from relationships and social interaction because the thoughts that nobody likes me consume me.
But, everyday I wake up and push through. I appear resilient, confident, and strong because I am even on the days I don’t feel it.
I’m ridiculously thankful to have a partner who understands and doesn’t get upset when he comes home and nothing has been done around the house. I have a son who thinks his momma is the best thing in the world... they both still want to kiss me, hug me, and cuddle. My family and friends stand behind me supporting me and cheering me on through this messy life.
I’m depressed and that’s okay right now.
I am entirely blessed and loved and for all of this I am thankful.