2013 was an awful year for me. Sure, a lot of amazing things happened but it was also full of loneliness, shame, stress and a heartbreak that destroyed me. I somehow came up after that but my head was still circling around that year and what happened and things I’ve could have done better. Also, when something new that was bad happened, I took it in blaming my self and hold on to it, letting it break me. I would desperately hold on to people that was toxic because I couldn’t bare the experience and shame of losing again (making me the worst ex-girlfriend ever). I would just hold on to the pain just as I was holding on to everything else. Even though I was kind of fine and could laugh and love and enjoy things, everything still seemed hard. Being happy, like real happy seemed so hard
After years I finally decided to seek help from a therapist. Now here I am. Probably the most happy I’ve ever been. My head is light and my heart is full and I love to smile and feel great because I am great. I just got my first tattoo, obviously inspired by the @alltimelow song “Old Scars/ Future Hearts”. This band makes me excited for the future and makes me want to make it as amazing as possible so this is also a tribute to them. It feels so great not looking back at sadness and pain all the time and I want to remember this feeling. Hopefully this tattoo can remind me when something bad happens to me again someday.
Also: if you’re not as happy as you should be seek help. Even if you’re not that bad you still deserve to get better. And oh my god it’s worth it #tattoo #firsttattoo #alltimelow #oldscarsfuturehearts #quoteish #mentalhealth #dysthymia #happy #happiness #mentalhealthrecovery #music #help #lookforward