I had waited 4 years for this moment. I bought Milk and Honey when it first came out, when she self published, and read through it so many times as I collected lil nature momentos, which I gathered whenever I thought of my girlfriend at the time, to put strategically between the pages that made me think of her (I’m sappy romantic AF y’all!!). I’d leaf through the pages and just let the words soak my soul and was always amazed how few words she really needed to say the biggest of things. I wanted so badly to hear her read them but the closest she came to Seattle was B-Ham and I dunno what I was doing... but I know I didn’t go, which I’m still kinda kicking myself for not doing.
So fast forward to this tour...I was neurotic as fuck about getting tickets, like I am, always, and this time paid off BIG TIME! This isn’t zoomed in. This isn’t me running to the front and darting back to my seat. This was taken from my seat... I just stood up a wee for compositions sake. I may not have gone up to B Ham but this sure felt intimate as hell with thousands of people.
I snapped one pic of her reading her poems, then I decided I wanted to be 100% THERE and no where else. I *turned OFF* my phone, laid it under my leg and just watched, listened, cheered, whistled, laughed cried and couldn’t stop fucking smiling!
It’s amazing the pull these devices have on us, the desire to capture and share, to document the truly undocumentable. Nothing I would’ve captured would’ve done this experience justice, so instead of failing I just let this be for... me. I think I want more moments in my life to be like that, ephemeral in their nature, experienced in the moment and absorbed into my soul vs hard drive space. Not everything needs to be captured and some things are too special and beautiful to capture.