Here’s this thing I did and I kind of want to talk about it. I bought a ring. It was made in 1920, the year the 19th amendment was ratified and white women earned the right to vote, and something about that seemed to fit.
As I reach an age where more and more of my friends are getting engaged or married, I still – at the age of 31 - struggle with deciding what I want for myself. I've been down that road before with a broken engagement that left battle wounds I still feel, even years later. And I’ve been reluctant to retrace those footsteps ever since. I simultaneously enjoy watch friends partner up - being buoyed by a sense of hope and happiness that love and companionship exists and good people find their way towards one another, while concurrently feeling a stubborn resistance to sacrificing my independence.
And while I haven't made up my mind yet, I do know I don't want to wait for a partner to give me the things I want out of life. So this my re-appropriation of the unspoken cultural norms that a partner has to provide for you the economic or emotional stability for the life you want. No. I’ll just take it for myself, thank you. My power is self-made, is gifted to me by the support of those I hold dear, and is gifted back in return to those deserving of it. It is not validated by a sole relationship – it is formed of many. And I am still learning how to wield it.
#me #antique #ring #shift #norms #dowhatyouwant