Jay-Z and Buddha were sitting in a tree.
Jay-Z: ‘I heard you have some theory or something that enlightens people and sh*t.’ Buddha smiled, Jay-Z continued: ‘Well boy, I could use me some of that enlightenment because I got me some new twins and lord they cute and all, but they refuse to sleep.’ Also Blue Ivy, my oldest one, she's starting to get some serious attitude. The apple don't fall far from the tree, you know what I'm sayin'. You know Beyoncé, right? My wive? That one goes all Sascha Fierce when she cranky. Especially with those pregnancy hormones. I'm tired man. These women...’
Buddha looked at Jay-Z and said: ‘I cannot help you with your problems.’
Jay-Z: ‘Well damn. Then why we sitting in this tree, all uncomfortable, dirty and sh..’
Buddha: ‘If you having girl problems I feel bad for you son, but we all got 99 problems. I could only help you with one.’
Jay-Z: ‘Hit me.’
Buddha: ‘Listen to some old school Bob Marley, may he rest in peace and stop fighting your fate. Don't worry 'bout a thing.’