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Happy Friday! Behind my smile today is a realisation that I have a number of weeks left with just my little Lola before baby 2 joins our family 🌟
I count my lucky stars everyday but I also feel guilty for so many reasons today.
I was asked once if I thought that having gone through IVF changed the way I was as a mum. I truly believe I would be the same mum whatever the circumstances. But for me I do experience guilt if I ever struggle with any emotion surrounding pregnancy and motherhood that isn't anything other than happy and positive. I'm trying to remind myself today that it's ok to feel other emotions... Has anyone else experienced something similar?

A very unique shot of a case of miscarriage.
Can you guess the age of this fetus?
Follow us @medshots for more shots!

You will carry your kids with your own hands;
where is your Amen? ➡ These 4 herbal supplements is all you need to get you pregnant in just 30 DAYS! TRY IT NOW ➡ contact 08132411700 #detox #detoxwater #fiberdetox #fibroids #fertilitytreatment #fibroids #anovulation #pid #pregnantwomenarebeautiful #preweddingnaija #pelvicpain #hormones #miscarriage #myomar #spermcount #erection etc

We thought we were having a miscarriage but instead found out it is an ectopic pregnancy. 😞For those of you unfamiliar with an ectopic pregnancy it means that the baby will not survive & has to be surgically removed along with one of my Fallopian tubes. I posted two new videos on my Vlog channel updating you in more detail. I am just waiting to have surgery now. 🙏🏻❤️ #ectopicpregnancy #miscarriage #summertimesadness

Aveces un cielo gris no significa tristeza, quiere decir que pronto llegara el arcoiris.. Puedo decir que en este maquillaje exprese el triste sentimiento que habitaba en mi, cuando por primera vez me di cuenta que una pequeña luz crecía en mi vientre, pero por motivos inexplicables esa luz se apago y mi cuerpo se encontraba vacío.. Tal vez no era el momento porque Dios es perfecto y tenía mejores planes.. y así sucedió a los meses me di cuenta que esa luz volvía alumbrar mi vida, que había vuelto para cambiar todo mi mundo, esperaba con ansias tu llegada, hasta que llegó el momento que Dios te envío a mi lado y nos conocimos mi pequeña Helena, conocí el amor verdadero..
Ahora soy tal feliz mi niña no imaginas cuanto es el amor ir siento por ti, cada una de tus perfectas sonrisas.. No me alcanza el tiempo ni las palabras para agradecerle a Dios por esta hermosa experiencia que es estar contigo.. Te amo mi #rainbowbaby 🌈 mi pequeña Helena! 🙏🏽👧🏽🌸 _______
#miprincesa #mivida #myeverything #loveuprincess #godfirst #thanksgod #diosesamor #miscarriage #raimbow

•Relief, Gratitude and Peace• Being pregnant was one of the biggest opportunities that God has given me to truly trust and rely on him. After having a miscarriage, I had every reason to be fearful, anxious and untrusting when we finally got pregnant again. I knew I could spiral down in the google-searching, overly-obsessing rabbit hole far too easy and ultimately miss out on enjoying the incredible miracle my body was creating. I had to make a conscious decision that I would choose faith over fear. When I did that, I honestly and humbly allowed God to come into my body, mind and spirit. It was the most freeing experience to finally give up this illusion of control that I thought I had. I got to experience pregnancy with so much love, trust and gratitude for my body & God. I'll never forgot how special this experience was...how special she is...and how BIG and GOOD God is. ✨

My sweet baby bird. This was our only family photo with you in it. We miss you already. 💛
Seth and I are so overwhelmed by the incredible amount of support, love, encouragement, and prayer we have received from everyone since our #miscarriage announcement. Messages, emails, comments on Instagram, Facebook, YouTube, Twitter.. like wow! We feel SO covered in love it's unbelievable. Thank you. God is faithful.
#miscarriageawareness #miscarriagesupport #miscarriagesucks #babybird #myvillage

Dear Little One,
Three months ago today you made me a mommy and filled my heart in a way I had never known. The joy that I felt when I saw that 💙➕is something I cannot even put into words. I was whole. I waited for you for what feels like a million years and I began to think that you may never come. The moment I found out I was going to be able to hold your little fingers, kiss your sweet cheeks, sing you to sleep, and make you giggle is one that I will always cherish. Every night I fell asleep holding my belly because I couldn't believe you were really mine. I dreamt about what you would look like and who you would become. I thought about seeing you for the first time and how it was even possible to be happier than I was. Eight weeks of dreaming, planning, and feeling overjoyed wasn't long enough. We were going to meet you on December 31, 2017, instead, we are going to meet you in Heaven. I wasn't ready but I knew you had to go. So, rather than holding you in my arms, I will hold you in my heart and remember the day that you changed my life.
I love you,

My favourite room in the house, Ava's nursery. 💕Having designed a lot of nurseries for other people and having to wait a long time for my own baby, by the time Ava came along I knew exactly how I would design it. I always feel so lucky whenever I walk into her bedroom and am met by her smiles and laughter. For a long time I didn't think I'd be a mum so it's something I'll never take for granted. I like to share lots of my life with my followers but some things are too raw at the time so I never shared the difficulties we had trying for a baby. I had 6 miscarriages before Ava came along and was close to giving up, although part of me was more scared that I wouldn't be able to stop trying and that I wouldn't know when enough was enough and be able to move on. It was such a painful and lonely experience as often you feel like you're the only one going through it. Tonight I'm sharing this for those of you who have had losses or are currently going through one. Social media can be a difficult place to be when you are struggling to have a baby or have just lost a much longed for one. You are not alone and it doesn't make you less of a woman or a man or any of the other things you might tell yourself like I did. It is just really bad luck. I must have seen over ten doctors by the time I found the right one. In the end the doctor that made a difference was Dr Raj Rai who works in the multiple miscarriage clinic at St Mary's hospital, Lesley Reagan and all the other doctors in the department are amazing too.. ( they have NHS & private) Dr Rai will be mortified that I've mentioned him on social media but he is one of the most amazing people I've ever met and I have him to thank for my beautiful Ava. #miscarriage #miscarriageawareness


Precious Wings memory boxes and miscarriage memory bags are donated to Queensland hospitals to be given to families facing the devastating loss of their child ❤️ Each box is donated in loving memory of a child gone too soon ❤️
📷 @clairepitcherphotography

I haven't openly spoke about my losses on social media, I've always felt that it's not something to be shared so widely, but after my last loss, and the fact that miscarriage is such a taboo subject I decided enough was enough. I may never be able to have another child, and the babies I have lost will always be recognised within our family ❤️ #babylossawareness #miscarriage #family #love #health #loss #neverforget

Last year, when I saw my second angel baby for the first time. 👼 #thirdpregnancy #miscarriage #2016

Ksitigarbha is known for his vow to take responsibility for the instruction of all beings in the six worlds between the death of Gautama Buddha and the rise of Maitreya, as well as his vow not to achieve Buddhahood until all hells are emptied. He is therefore often regarded as the bodhisattva of hell-beings, as well as the guardian of children and patron deity of deceased children and aborted fetuses in Japanese culture, where he is known as Jizō or Ojizō-sama, as a protector of children.

#nekobox #jizo #abel #miscarriage #japan

R E D Friday 🇺🇲

When it's a rest day, but you find weights. (His laugh is the best, mine is the worst. I'm sorry. 😳) #latergram #toddlerweights

Today 7/21/2017 was my due date. Today, 7/21/2017 would've been your birthday! Today, you would've made me a mother of two. Today, you would've made Mia a big sister. God only knows why these things happen but will I ever understand or accept it? I don't think I can. All I know is that I have all of this love to give. Enough for both you and Mia. But god had other plans & as much as it hurts, I have to go on with life wondering what it would've been like having you right by our side. Now, Mia is the one receiving double the love ❤️ I will forever remember you & love you love bug 💕 continue resting in peace & watching over your big sister 👼🏻 #Miscarriage #Miscarriageawareness #foreveramotheroftwo #Miasaysitwasaboy #babyboy #baby2 #heartbroken #foreverloved

Half kilo of veegetables #broccoli #cucumber #pumpkin #grapetomatoes🍅 #edamame #peas #celery #sesameseeds #capsicum #oliveoil
Celery is poor in carbs and protein even zero fat. To digest it needs more callories than its callories.

The strength is on its alkalizing mineral salts which effective in neutralizing excess acids in the body.
Good for #gout #asamurat #diabetes #hypertension #psoriasis #edena #arthritis and effective in lowering #cholesterol .

But not for pregnant women ! Since its potential for #miscarriage.

Pilot program starting right here with Project Sweet Peas -Greater Lafayette. These Miscarriage boxes will be delivered to a participating OB/GYN office soon! #miscarriage #miscarriageawareness #miscarriagesupport #pail #pailawareness

It's hard to believe that 12 years ago today, we said a very painful goodbye to our (stillborn) son, Chickpea.
I remember the gut wrenching pain, the sadness and the desperation we felt when they gave us the news he had died (at 27.5 weeks gestation). And then the indescribable heartache, the physical agony and the mental disbelief that I still had to go through a painful delivery... only to leave the hospital with empty arms.
But... through all of that and in every moment, I felt, I saw and I know that Jesus was there with us. He was with us for every difficult moment, holding my hand, giving me strength to push and peace knowing that He was going to take our sweet angel with Him to Heaven. It was a moment(s) of sweet surrender and pure peace.

We trust that Gods plan and purpose for our angel boy is perfect and we look forward to seeing that sweet little face (and his sibling, Jellybean) again someday in Heaven. ❤️

Too damn right I am.
Wee bit mad today... I say a bit. Kinda wanted to shout a lot, but it didn't seem like a good idea.
Blog post 'I wouldn't have bothered' now up. (Link in Bio.) "My Mum- she's only 13 weeks. Personally I wouldn't have bothered that early.

Oh. 'Personally I wouldn't have bothered'

What tell people? Why? I mean why the hell shouldn't she? Isn't the stupid ass rule pregnant women are supposed to stick to before telling people you're pregnant 12 weeks anyway!? Why the hell shouldn't she tell people as soon as she knows. I don't see anything good about waiting till 12 weeks. Its just a stupid rule that makes telling people about Miscarriage even harder because if people don't know you're pregnant in the first place then it's harder to tell anyone you have had a loss. I know all about that.

The only thing the 12 week wait rule does is make it harder to get support, increases the isolation those who are affected by miscarriage feel, and fuels the stupid stigma that surrounds the whole thing." #lossmama #babyloss #Iamthe1in4 #speakout #lifeafterloss #breakthestigma #parents #knitting #blog #lossblogger #angry #miscarriage #Emmet #family

Do you ever have a day where you just feel like it's so hard to keep hope alive? I swear some days I put myself together and feel like I'm living a double life. #fertility #infertility sucks. It can feel like it completely knocks you down emotionally, tear your relationships apart. Everything can take a hit at times. I have so many more good days than not but there's still so many times where I get lost in thought thinking "I should be 6 months pregnant right now" or "I wonder what my babies would've looked like". #miscarriage hurts like hell, not even sure of the right words to describe it. I am so much stronger after what I've gone through but dang it can send some hurt to the heart at times. I am so #blessed to have two wonderful kids. Lunabella is so intune with me, even when I'm "faking it", she knows. She comes up to me grabs my face and kisses me. I don't have all the answers, life isn't all unicorns and fairytales but I'm so thankful to have this life. Trying hard to accept and love my journey.

Babysitting two beautiful children today and they are genuinely the most wonderful kids I've ever had the pleasure of taking care of. I've cooked for them, played with them and put them to bed and checking up on them regularly to make sure they're okay. It just makes me crave to be a Mommy to have been able to be so intimate with them.. and the little one that's literally so close to being the same age as my baby would have been, I would steal her for myself if I could. So unbelievably content but I suppose I feel envious that this couple have such amazing children.
#ttc #healthproblems #prediabetes #childminder #babysitter #ttcrainbowbaby #miscarriage

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