Final week of the semester from hell.📚 Y’all, I didn’t know if I was gonna make it. My homework load was so heavy, I’ve had to give up shifts at work every week. I’ve had multiple breakdowns and dreams of surrender. The stress of school has been triggering my eating disorder. Hard.😩
It’s hard to finish you B.A. at 27, when everyone else your age has a career or is starting a family. I feel like I failed when I dropped out and fundamentally altered the course of my life. Like I’m behind everyone and I’m just struggling with that insecurity.😕
I have to be gentle and remind myself that when I left Gonzaga, I did it for my health. I called my mom and said, “I either need help or I’m going to die.” Within days, she was with me and flying me across the country for inpatient treatment. Although this decision fucked with my education, it allowed me to keep fighting for my life and I couldn’t be more grateful for everyone who supported me during that time.
It’s this soothing reminder on really tough days, when the deadlines are approaching and the papers are piling that in the end, life and health outweigh academia. It’s a sign to let go of that 4.0 because no one looks at your grades anyway! Just keep breathing, do what you’ve gotta do, and take care of yourself. Oh, and party like hell once that semester ends!🥂🎉