Goddamnit. I hate when this happens. Patchogue. I assume it's pronounced "Pah-chohg"? Like "Vogue"? "Kylie Minogue?" Not "pah-chow-gway"? Anyone? I ask because now I have that damned "Vogue" song in my head--but with "Vogue" replaced by "Patchogue." ("Patchogue, Patchogue, Patchogue. Beauty's where you find it. Goooo with the flooooooow.") Anyway, sorry for the late notice (but really, it's not like you pay me. If so, I want a raise, a new chair, and longer coffee breaks. And I want Vicki fired because all she does is disppear to smoke her Virginia Slims all day and I'm sick of it.) But if you live in Patchogue, Patchoghue, Patchogue you have a movie to go see tomorrow night. And don't give me that malarkee about it being cold outside. Oh, boo-hoo. You chose to live on Long Island, you bundle up, damnit. There's a theater showing Gone With the Wind. Layer like a normal person! If you live in Patchogue, Patchogue, Patchogue, I assume you know where the Patchogue Patchogue, Patchohgue Theater is. (It's at 71 East Main Street in case you need me to do your remembering for you at these cheap wages you pay me.) Tickets are sold at the door: $15 Adult, $12 Children and Seniors. Roy Moore and date get in for $27. (I can't help it; I just had sugar.) If you live in Suffolk County or near it, Vivien and Clark expect to see you there and I wanna see a picture of you in your mittens with the theater marquee above you. Patchogue, Patchogue, Patchogue. Suffolk's where you find it. Gooooo in the snooooow.
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