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1/3 I was like "wow girl u never look this good without makeup" and then I was like "u also never have a team of people trying to make you look good without makeup". #justbeingreal

Alle schönen Dinge kommen in roségold💕 #justbeingreal #nostrappynome

As sweet as sugar, Hard as ice, Hurt me once, And I'll kill you Twice✌🏾☺️😜 #justbeingreal

Lately I've been feeling pretty down about my physique and overall progress this prep. I feel bloated, "fluffy", not lean at all and small...all at the same time. Now please...I'm not looking for sympathy or anything...I just want to share every aspect of my prep on my page with you guys.
I didn't realize how hard mentally prep was going to be. Especially when I still struggle with body dysmorphia and low self-esteem. I beat myself up about the way I look constantly...
I try to stay positive but some days (and in this case, about an entire week or so) I just feel awful about my prep... I'm getting pretty close to my show (7 weeks out tomorrow) and all I keep thinking is: "Am I going to be ready?"
I know I may not look bad to the average person but it's important to like your own physique instead of just getting comments from people saying I look good.
I'm human too. I have good days and I have bad. Hopefully it's just up from here because I can't keep putting myself through this much longer.
#JustBeingReal #Struggling #NPCFigure

💭#honestmoment "I was thinking this morning how ALL things work together for the good of them that love God and are called according to his purpose..💭 ALL THINGS‼️ Not SOMETHINGS‼️But all things will work together for your good. Meaning the good things, the hard things, the heartbreaks💔, the things that made you cry😫, the low tough moments😢, the moments that nearly broke you, the things you lost, will all work together for your good.
But that works only if you love God 💝And are called according to his purpose. 👣 "DO YOU LOVE GOD???💭" "Are you doing HIS will or are you doing your own"???💭 Well I guess you now know why ALL things are NOT working together for your good. Think about it..💭 #justbeingreal #truth #fromjeremiewithlove❤️

Soooooo this is real 😂😂😂 Screen shot from my Facebook messages. 😱😑😶 To know me is to know that I am so bad at all communication - texts, emails, phone calls, Facebook messages, you name it! I promise it's not personal. It's not about you it's about me. But I do respond in my head every single time. #justbeingreal #sorrytotheworld

A year ago,i would have died for certain people😃.A year later,half of them are dead to me😅😕..

CLEARANCE 25%OFF // Use code "CLEARANCE" on all orders // Kottura will be slowing down production over the next couple months to get things in order and catch up to the demands // Lately, I've been pushing day in and day out to balance and TRY to meet all expectations with very little progress // This clearance will allow me to free up space and "start fresh" // So, for now, please enjoy this discount and what's left online while I get back to the drawing board and work on new designs and a more efficient way of dishing out and shipping orders in a timely manner // Thank you and see ya'll soon // #OneManTeam #JustBeingReal ▪️▪️▪️▪️▪️▪️▪️▪️▪️▪️▪️▪️▪️▪️ SHIPPING: If you've placed an order and haven't received tracking info yet, you can expect it in your email within the next few days .... so so so sorry for the delay but rest assured you will get your orders. This is not the standard I want to set for Kottura so this is definitely something I am going to work hard at in the following months. Thank you for all your patience and understanding. BLESS UP!!!


When your off and your friend doesn't respect your sleep...
There's a light in my soul that burns deep within
Still alone waiting for someone to be able to withstand the heat
That exudes from every pore in my body
Waiting patiently to heal and patch up that special one that knows my worth ~AJ~

#endlessopportunities #pushingforward #justme #purpose #ready #2017 #justbeingreal #noexcuses #makingmynextmove #livinglife #notpressedforfriends #melaninpoppin #mywords #mythoughts #elevate #lgbt #pride #blackisbeautiful #knowyourworthladies #myskinisreallythatsmooth #inmythoughts #untiltherighttime #love

Alle schönen Dinge kommen in roségold💕 #justbeingreal #nostrappynome

I am amazingly proud of the progress I've made in my healthy journey. Really I am. I've slimmed down. Lost 43 lbs total since I began! I've drawn out muscles from hiding spots I never even knew existed! My arms are so toned, I've got calf and quad muscles! People tell me I look AAAAAmazing all the time. An for the most part I FEEL amazing. But I believe we all have one thing about ourselves that no matter how much people compliment us, we'll always secretly think, " but if only you'd see my _____, you'd probably think differently." For me, it's my abs. I'm tryin SOOOOO hard to tighten them, but truth be told, I've had 4 babies in that belly an I'm not sure if I'll ever see a 6 pack. Doesn't mean I'll quit trying. Quite the opposite actually. But still...it doesn't stop me from getting down sometimes when I look down and don't "see" a 6 pack.
An then I get a wake up call this morning that said, "STOP BEING SO HARD ON YOURSELF!" In the most innocent comment from my 12 yr old son...
"Mom, look at your ABS!!!" I kinda blew it off like "what abs?!" But honestly, I think he was that small nudge of confidence telling me, don't be so hard on yourself Emily, you're doing amazing! Celebrate the small milestones, instead of wallowing in self pity. Cuz your children are amazingly proud of you, an you're setting an amazing example for them. CELEBRATE your accomplishments!
Let us all stop being so harsh on ourselves and start believing that anything is possible as long as we DON'T QUIT!
So do I have some extra flab, from 4 pregnancies, yup sure do! Do I need to be ashamed of it and hide it, hell no! It carried 4 beautiful babies in there! Do I have a 6 pack there yet? Nope...but I got goals! An I won't stop just because it's taking me a little longer to get them. I'll just dig deeper and trust and believe that in due time and with hard work, consistency, effort, dedication and discipline, I WILL get them one day!
Don't ever give up my friends! You. Can. Do. It!!

#day26 #knittogetherbyadoption #picoftheday challenge: #peace
#sorrynotsorry for this meme, but #icouldnthelpmyself
This actually sums up #adoption and #fostercare for me, in that order. The number of people I met in the foster care system who were working against the kids instead of for them (and often didn't even realize it) was too great (in a field where one would be too many). Thinking about them still makes me angry. Conversely, our adoption has brought us nothing but peace. This is not me saying don't do foster care. Quite the opposite. We need people doing both. And many people who do foster care end up adopting. #justbeingreal about how it often makes feel.

And last time I checked they don't pay my bills... or fund my pampering, shoe and purse fund... or my child's and husband's expensive golf taste... or our family vacations... or going to pay for our soon to be nonprofit organization... IJS #justbeingreal #dowhatYOUlove #befearless #dreambig

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