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For those that don't know, I had surgery on my mouth Friday. I got a tooth extracted, the infection that went into my sinuses was removed, and an implant put in- which is basically a screw in my gums.๐Ÿ˜ƒ. A lot of the swelling is down today but my face still feels huge. I thought the doc said 2-3 days no gym, but he meant 2-3 days no activity, and a week no gym ๐Ÿ˜ญ. I thought he was being over protective so I asked my step mom who had the same surgery done and she was out for a week too. So my last full week here before my next trip and I am not allowed to lift. It kinda hurts the soul. BUT all I can do in this moment is focus on the positive. I AM getting healthier every day. I AM clear of all infection/ sickness. And it's literally only up from here. When you're in a situation, you can choose to focus on the negative or focus on the positive. Like my good friend @mariewoldfitness said, in the grand scheme of things this small little bubble of time won't even be a second thought in my head.... so today after my doc called me while I was on the way to the gym๐Ÿ˜‡, made me promise not to actually workout, I took a selfie, did 3 sets of abs, and the slowest steady state cardio ever... the rest of the week I am going to focus on foam rolling, stretching, maybe take a yoga class, and anything I can do to enhance recovery. Also my vlog camera is being shipped from New York, where I left it, so sorry I've been MIA from YouTube but I haven't had my footage to edit. Sorry for the longest caption ever but just wanted to update everyone on my current status. โค๏ธ ps. Watch my Instagram story for the prettiest sunset ever. #Evolve #ItsFine #iJustLaughAtLifeSometimes #WhatCanYaDo

How many fk's I give about making the news. So please stop messaging me about it. #itsfine #ytg

You better not holla if I cuff her forever ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ#murica #guns #leggings #aaf #donutkillmyvibe #darkhair #casuallyfallingoffthestool #itsfine #nomakeup

posting this pic instead because i got all of the final images back today and it's one of my faves ๐Ÿ˜‡ #crookedsmile #itsfine ๐Ÿ™‚๐Ÿ˜

The other day I was looking at pictures from high school and thought out loud "wow, I was so small!!" My sister got irritated with me because I kept saying this and she was like "Becca, you're still small!!!" lol I wasn't looking at these pictures in longing (she thought I was saying I wished I was that skinny again), rather I looked at them in disbelief because during that time of my life, I thought I was huge. You probably just laughed out loud, and I am here laughing too, but I genuinely thought that. I thought I was unlikeable because of the size of my body. Not only that, I thought my smile was hideous and I always tried to hide it.
Now I'm not here to tell you that I am completely over those insecurities, and frankly I'm not sure I'll ever be completely over themโ€”some days are just hard and other days I don't think about it. I am here to say though that the standard of bodies needs to change.
My boyfriend in high school would say things to me like "wow, you're looking really buff these days..." or "you have a nice butt, but you could probably work on it." Or how bout "you're basically perfect, except for your teeth." Lol really not okay right? Though I don't think he said those things to be malicious, they always stuck with me. It didn't help that he was also constantly cheating on me, so I constantly looked at myself and compared myself to other bodies. I looked through Victoria's Secret ads thinking I was just so big. I felt huge. And this body I once found pride in and praised for its victories in athletics, now was a body I was ashamed to look at. I started to look at my body differently and treat it likewise. Fitness was and is something that has always been important to me, but I used to look at fitness as not a way to take care of my body, rather to change it. I constantly took progress pictures and obsessed over how I looked and what I ate. "I'm not skinny enough, it's not working" and blah blah blah. I started lifting in tenth grade and this was a very good thing for me as it showed me what my body was capable of, and I loved being strong. But for years I fought between being skinny and being muscular.... (continued in a comment)

Oh Taylor.. Your laugh is so contagious, and your sweet, loving heart for others is one I truly admire!! You are one I aspire to be like! You are one of the very few people that can make me laugh uncontrollably, and I love to laugh!! Thanks for laughing with me!! I love you to pieces!!๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿผ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿฝโค๏ธ #wegotthegiggles #itsfine #okay #solid

"I'm Fine" Phone Case
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Glad i got to spend my birthday with yall!!๐Ÿ’• #eventhojustinruinedit #itsfine


#ItsFine #EverythingIsFine #FirstStepIsAcceptance

Don't ever take life too seriously. #ImAChild #ItsFine #bestjob #blessed #dutchbros #love

Welcome to the Discovery park... #itsfine

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