So the past month I haven't been feeling very body positive at all. Which is quite miserable considering I was in a really good place prior to all this. Fact is I took my eye off the ball and allowed myself to naturally relax while I was on my all inclusive holiday for two weeks, three If you count the big wedding lead up. Even prior to that during my Powerlifting comp I was eating a calorie surplus, in fact I wasn't tracking at all, I was fuelling my body hard so I could make the gains and smash my comp. which I did, but considering I started my journey to fat-lose, it wasn't good for me to go the other way. I am not saying if you powerlift you have to be fat! I'm saying I allowed myself to take my eye off the ball and used Powerlifting as an excuse to eat extra crap. CRAP! Please don't do that.
I love Powerlifting so much, but I loved shredding down and feeling good about myself more, and as I had shown I wasn't able to be Powerlifting and shredding (that's just me! It can be done by others!) I decided a few weeks ago I was going to fully concentrate on normal - lifting and shredding down, and head back into Powerlifting when I was happier with my body. There's no comps I'm interested in this year, so the realisation came at the right time.
So the past 4 weeks or so I've been feeling pretty neg about my body, there's extra chub that's returned from my original shred, that makes me a bit of a failure, I wouldn't even post, I was gonna just not mention it on here till I got back to feeling good again. But I've always preached about honestly during this process, so there you go, sometimes you go backwards, it fucking sucks but it happens, and I'm tired of beating myself up about it. And you know what, instead of fighting it and ignoring it, it's nice to finally open up about it, as it happens I've had some struggles finding outfits for going out cause I'm not pleased with my body... (CONTINUE READING IN COMMENTS)......