Warning I’ve written a novel about growing your confidence (because it’s late and things get deep when it’s late ok😅) so if any of you get to the end the caption is continued in the comments 🏔
You know self worth- that’s a gosh darn nice feeling. In my teen years bullying was something I accepted that would happen to me because I was different. I just got on with my life because I never felt the need for everyone to love me or what I was about, I loved me, I understood who I was and for the ones who didn’t understand, that was ok. I didn’t feel the need or be the most popular or better than anyone else. I was lucky to have such a strong sense of self at a young age. But isn’t it funny how despite the constant chat from irrelevant people, the ones you dare to trust are the ones who can really tear you down. At the age of 16 after my first ever heartbreak, I emerged from an abusive relationship as a blank canvas. I suddenly “fitted in”, and that’s when I really started to feel lost. Confidence doesn’t come to you because you’re considered popular or beautiful. Confidence is only truly present when you have a strong sense of self. Even when I used to walk down the street and have abuse yelled at me because of my crazy hair or my blue skinny jeans with purple lightning bolts on them, I never questioned myself, I didn’t need to. I was just being me. That’s a feeling l’ve longed for and a feeling I’ve missed, a feeling replaced with the bleakness of anxiety and confusion.
So often when searching for confidence people tell us to list things we like about ourselves, we often look to our physical attributes, favourites of which were somewhat lost on me. But I’m lucky, because something that has never changed is that I’m confident in my kindness and empathy, my ability to create, to run fast and, I know that if you get a glass of prosecco down me I’m a damn good time 💃🏼. There are still of course things that I’m only quietly proud of, things that I am far too chronically embarrassed to share with other people 🎸🎤😂 but recently I’ve pushed myself, I’ve started to celebrate myself and the things that I’ve worked for. ⬇️