Why am I sobbing at 1am?
Because THIS is the perfect book for this moment in my life.
The thing is...after this past week, coming after the last six months, after the preceding two years, and the 30 before that...these 200 pages have some of that “you need to fucking HEAR this right now” that is an odd balance of explanation and guidance that I am, in fact, on the right path.
If this is a hero journey cycle thing...the start is delving into the HAMILTON cast recoding at a time where literally only theatre was keeping me alive. (Literally and completely without hyperbole) That time galvanized so many things, and also relight something inside of ME—that to look back from here renders the me in the aftermath of my own #saturnreturn ...totally unrecognizable. But there is still, at the core of all of it, the girl who is scared shitless of the life she chose and of failing at everything. The next chapter, though, follows a Me that has what had never truly been there before: a proven and permanent net for if she *does* fall. And having that and trusting in that makes it a lot harder to be scared. And a little easier to trust myself. ...to the point where one week ago when everything could have fallen apart and all of the work could have unraveled I took a breath, relaxed my shoulders, and stretched the wings I’ve always had but didn’t know how to use.
I think I am finally ready to fly, y’all.
My deepest and most sincere gratitude to @leslieodomjr for this book, and for somehow managing to call me out by calling me in.
#thetrashofthething #hamiltrash #butreallythough #failingup #thestagemanagementchronicles #workworkwork #writing #seriouslybetweenthisandcarriefishersbook #iamfeelingveryattacked #bytherelevantcontent #waitforit