You know what makes me most uncomfortable? Feeling guys check me out, the fear of unwanted attention. I used to love it, eyes of admiration & desire feeding my ego. It only took once, for someone to shake me, to shatter my trust in humans. One guy decided to go there, to do as he pleased while I slept & I was changed forever. The trauma didn't hit me all at once but crept into (or out of) me eventually.
There were a lot of factors that came into play when life got so heavy I thought I'd break & die. This was one of many.
I can't explain the ways that this has positively affected me... but the process of healing has presented unbelievable gifts & paradigm shifts. I don't wish anything different.
I truly believe that our hardest struggles guide us to healing that our souls desire on a much deeper level than this life alone.
This is a sensitive subject & I don't intend to offend. I honor you & your pain & your process.
I don't desire pity but want to inspire those that are hurting to keep breathing.
If I never hit a bottom, I wouldn't have finally faced my fear of feeling & started dealing with my pain & trauma with respect, as the wise teachers they are, pushing & pulling me to grow.
I am truly grateful for this ever changing, exhilarating, sometimes terrifying journey. I am grateful for the vehicle of yoga, reconnecting me to my body, my light, my trust & a fucking amazing community.
I've wanted to write this post for a while, as a reminder, we've all been through a lot, it doesn't matter whose story is worst. There's no need to judge ourselves & compare our bodies or stories to others. Don't assume someone has it easy or that you know why they act as they do.
& your demons may be diamonds in hiding.
#yoga # yogaeverydamnday #yogaeveryday #movement #mobility #handstand #handstandpress #strength #fitness #lifecoach #hawaii #healthylifestyle #healing #peace #discomfort #meditation #love #booty #metoo #shit #love