I crouched down, in the silence of her absence. Loves alchemy transmuted my cupped hands into a broom, as I swept the dead rose petals she threw to the center of my room. It was then that I felt it. Liberation paying us a visit that night, though I wonder if I was the only one who felt it. The fleeting air of dysfunction, taking its leave, allowing me to breathe, emptying my every pore within my broken skin. My heart rolled down my sleeve and where it fell, I beheld what I have always seen. An incomplete love. My judgement was accurate, yet not condemning. I had wished that the year spent was all pretending, so as to loosen loves single handed grip from around my neck. The other hand named respect, had already fled, but not before balling her fingers into a fist, which struck me a clean blow, though I never bled. Beautifully bruised, I placed my heart back in my chest, and meditated to the beat.
The song was nostalgic, yet I couldn't register the lyrics. The rhythm had caught me but the words were faint, like spirits whispering tales from the other side, to whomever has an ear spiritually inclined. The lyrics began to reveal themselves, shouldering a message of succession. The last verse stated: Should you love and retain who you are, you have become a planet awakened amongst it's illuminate star. I interrupted my reception internally to pose a definitive question: Who am I? Is that you? Have you become a skilled sailor, upon your relationships, traversing life's changing perils, surmounting waves of stress, and finding safe shores to rest? Are you growing? Have you grown? Like the bud who struggles to climb heights in the shade of the grove, overcast by the leaves of the brother and sister sunflowers sharing the same home? Perhaps I will always question myself whenever I see a shadow of doubt. Perhaps if I allow the light to pierce me, the shadow would cease and my thinking would reroute. I try, I try, to apply reason alone, thinking my emotions may keep me bound to an unfamiliar home. I distant spirit from mind so as to observe the thinker. -poem con't in the next comment.