#JulyVinylChallenge Day 15: An album that makes you think of your spouse
Ô Paon - Courses (2010, Ô Paon Records)
One year and one week ago, a daughter lost a mother she would never know and a husband lost everything else. Geneviève Castrée was an illustrator and recording artist under the names Woelv and Ô Paon. She frequently collaborated with her husband, Phil Elverum of The Microphones and Mount Eerie. She died of pancreatic cancer on July 9th 2016, only one year after becoming a mother.
I started writing this entry about her and Phil and I actually used the phrase "we all lost a spouse that day". I deleted all of it. It was stupid and it was contrived and it was insincere. I didn't know where the hell I was going with it. But I still want to talk about it. So I'm gonna usurp the category so that I can say something real today.
I'm not married. I hope to be one day. But when I had heard of Geneviève's passing, I was reminded that the same pain her family feels is certainly coming for me too. I nearly had a breakdown earlier this year. I don't like to talk about it much outside of my family but I was dealing with a similar sense of loss. With the help of professionals, I eventually made peace with it. But for a while, a question plagued me: Is the love we give others worth the pain of losing them?
After a while, I made up my mind and decided that the answer had to be yes. There'd be no reason to carry on otherwise. So no matter what happens in your life, promise me that you'll give all the love you possibly can in one lifetime. Because I'm certain it's the only way we can keep moving forward.