Having a painattack is hard to describe. It feels like struggling in deep water afraid to drown in the torture of my body. Afraid to forget that there's a me behind the physical pain.
And when the pain is finally hushed by the Tramadol, it all goes blurry. Like I'm inside a jar with water that has just this slightly green light in it, so I can almost see the world but from a weird lonely distance.
I know this will pass too but sometimes I forget it does.
Then I knock on the glass and beg someone to... to just notice me. To remember I am in there struggling. Cause although I can slightly see the world on the other side of my pain, it's just feels so lonely inside.
#apicaday #GnoomsweetGnoom #fibromyalgia #fibrosurvivor #fibrowarrior #cvs #ME #chronicillness #chronicpain #painattack #insomnia #tramadol #painkiller #sleepless