Personal rant fair warning ⚠️ Yesterday I was not only publicly humiliated and made fun of in front of a group of foreign strangers but utterly and disgustingly fat shamed by grocery store workers for buying some chocolate to study with like most students here do.
I have struggled with weight for most of my life. I have been relentlessly teased, harassed, fat shamed, and cruelly bullied not only at school but by family as well. I have worked out and eaten right but in medical school it kind of took a back seat to sit for hours upon hours a day, and study, and trying to sleep. I know and knew I have always been bigger and taller than most people and I came to peace with that - learned to love me for me and have been trying to change the former for years. I thought the bullying stopped...but no. This semester I have been fat shamed on numerous occasions by school staff and now more locals. I don’t know what I did to deserve it. All I know is that my self -esteem is just as it was when I was an elementary school running home crying everyday because it just wouldn’t stop and never understood the hate - and that is where I am mentally and emotionally.
I’m ashamed to say that I have forced starved myself and the thought of eating is just as repulsive as looking in a mirror right now. I can’t stand to be out of clothes for more than a second, I don’t want people to look at me, I don’t want to interact, I don’t want anyone to any of this but alas, this is how I have to let it out (or maybe it’s the starvation of 30+ hours without food, who knows). Everyone is fighting a different or worse battle than the next. But please, if you read this or know someone like me, stop making people like me lose our one and only shred of confidence we have when we have worked YEARS to get it in the first place. We don’t like to wear our ‘Scarlet F’ just as much as we like you pointing it out. ✌️and blessings
#personal #fatshamed #fatshaming #thinprivilege #bullied #peoplearecruel #bebetter #dobetter #bekind #jkrowling