*possible long post*
I had a "me" day today. It was much needed (plus it was just good to get out of the house, ya know?).
I've been struggling a lot with my beliefs and spirituality and today something clicked. It clicked really hard. My issue is that I have a bit of a commitment issue and I hate the feeling when you start to love someone. That said, anytime I'm getting in a really good place with Jesus I just back away and put him in the back of my mind to forget (and trust me, I am so good at forgetting stuff I should get a certificate or something...).
But as I was watching the Passion Play this afternoon it clicked (during the scene where Jesus was with Mary and Martha right before his death) that I'm in love with Jesus. I'm utterly and completely in love with Him. It's taken me 18 years to figure this out and I have a light feeling in my chest now. I feel happy. And not giddy happy, or excited. Just...a real, wholesome, happiness
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