I have a birthday?! What better time for a narcissist or other personality disordered individual to make you feel worthless, stir up rivalry, triangulate, and inflict maximum psychological pain. Any attention on you somehow overshadows them.
Please share your experiences in the comments (if it's not too triggering for you) of the unhappy birthdays you've endured due to having a narcissistic family, significant other, friend, or maybe even all three. 😫
This is a tough and very triggering topic for me but I'll share a brief summary of my experiences.
Being raised in a violent and off the charts emotionally and psychologically abusive narcissistic home was purgatory at the best of times, but I always lived in hope that perhaps some day they might celebrate my birthday (or anything else), treat me to something nice, show unconditional love, let me have some attention for once, heck NOTICE me even, but nothing. Instead I was further abused in classic nefarious narc fashions on birthdays, as well as any other special occasions too.
The seasoned older narcs would not only ignore or sabotage my birthdays, but would even begrudge me going out to party with friends.
Even doing something small without them (due to their unwillingness) I would be hatefully accused of being 'over the top' or 'expecting too much attention'. Yet in contrast they would deliberately fawn over my narcissistic golden siblings on their birthdays (this was a set up done by design to hurt me because they also abused the golden sibs to a certain degree) adding yet another layer of pain.
If that wasn't enough, as my budding malignant narcissist siblings got older they were well groomed by the family to spoil or ignore my birthday too, yet spend a lot of time and money on one another (all for show, they have a dysfunctional relationship too), as an insidious underhand way of showing how much they dislike me. On top of that they would gaslight to the extreme if I either called them out or attempted to explain how much it hurt. Some people who are close to me have identified them all as being pathologically jealous, as well as hating on everyone in true narc style.