Day 5 ✨
Well today was not the greatest day. In terms of what I ate, I stuck to my regular breakfast (egg whites) and my snacks throughout the day consisted of cucumber, some baby pickles, a pepper and a few peperettes. Dinner was a yummy chicken salad made with celery and spiced chicken. Starting the day off with some fiber, #digestionplus and a pomegranate fizz with tea, I only needed one more fizz around 4pm to wake me up while I was (struggling) in the library. All in all I stuck to my goals and didn’t experience any cravings (Wohoo!). However, I had a midterm this morning that went pretty well, but following that I had a test on which I did NOT perform well whatsoever 🙃. I’ve been doing really well lately in terms of trying to keep my thoughts positive in an attempt to limit the amount of stress I place on myself, but even after reviewing the notes several times and writing and re-writing the overall concepts, I could not seem to recollect any of the information I learned, and I essentially ran out time and had to guess on a good portion of the questions. But shit happens I guess 🤷🏼♀️ After the hectic morning I went to the gym to try and blow off some steam and I ended up walking in to the gym with no plan of what I wanted to do - which very rarely happens to me because I’m all about planning and sticking to a routine each day. I felt sad and weak and I stood on the treadmill trying not to cry about how terribly I felt after my test and how frustrated I was with myself for not having my performance reflect all of the hard work I have been putting in day in and day out this semester.
The point of this post is to show that amongst many good days, either mentally or physically, I will struggle. I’m not perfect, but I am a perfectionist, and sometimes I am so hard on myself that when I don’t reach my daily goals or perfect everything on my ‘to-do’ list, I beat myself up at the end of the day. University is hard, life is hard, being a 20-year old is hard....but one bad day should not make me question my goals and my worth. Tomorrow I will be better, and I won’t let my fears and stress get to me. I’m ready for a full day of ~productive~ studying 🌚